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Carmela Soprano Quotes
 | Season 1 / Episode 9: - Boca Carmela Soprano: Let's just say your uncle has acquired quite a *taste* for her. Tony Soprano: Uncle Jun gives head? Carmela Soprano: World class. Tony Soprano: The old man's whistling through the wheat field? Carmela Soprano: Don't be disgusting! Tony Soprano: Oh, he's a Bushman of the Kalahari! [laughs] Carmela Soprano: [laughs] That's why I don't tell you anything 'cause you don't know when to stop! Tony Soprano: Oh my God, if this ever gets out. Carmela Soprano: Oh yeah, like you don't do it or any of your friends. Bunch of hypocrites. Tony Soprano: Hey, what goes on in this bedroom stays here and you know that. Carmela Soprano: Once a year? I can resist the urge to gossip. |
| Season 1 / Episode 9: - Boca Tony Soprano: Uncle Jun, how was Boca? Corrado 'Junior' Soprano: Wonderful. I don't go down enough. Carmela Soprano: That's not what I heard. |
 | Season 1 / Episode 8: - The Legend of Tennessee Moltisanti Larry Boy Barese: Oh, Mama Livia. Come sta, darling? Livia Soprano: Listen to him with that 'my darling'. I am nobody's darling. Larry Boy Barese: [to Tony] This one here, she never disappoints, I tell ya that. Livia Soprano: Are you still seeing your other women, Lorenzo? Carmela Soprano: [pulls her away] Come on, Ma. Let's mingle. Tony Soprano: Sorry. The older she gets the worse she gets. |
| Season 1 / Episode 8: - The Legend of Tennessee Moltisanti Tony Soprano: All right. You'd better give me your jewelry. Tony Soprano: Hey, they know we can't produce receipts. You want 'em stealing this stuff from us? Tony Soprano: Come on. Carmela Soprano: I'm not giving you my engagement ring. This isn't stolen! [beat, then frown] Is it? Tony Soprano: No! [beat] What do you think I am? |
 | Season 1 / Episode 7: - Down Neck Peter Galani: He often has difficulty waiting his turn, is often quote unquote, "on the go" or acts if driven by a motor. Often interrupts or intrudes on others. And often fidgets with hands or feet. Tony Soprano: He fidgets with hands or feet? Peter Galani: That's right. Tony Soprano: You mean, like, he fidgets? Peter Galani: Uh-huh. Tony Soprano: And that's a sickness, to fidget? Peter Galani: Mr. Soprano, it's one of nine possible symptoms. Tony Soprano: What constitutes a fidget? Carmela Soprano: Tony... Tony Soprano: No, no, what constitutes a fidget? I mean, so what if he fidgets? He's in school. Who doesn't fidget in school? And he doesn't wait his turn? The kid's in puberty, he gets a hard-on every ten minutes, for chrissake. |
 | Season 1 / Episode 5: - College Carmela Soprano: I was thinking about when we watched "Casablanca" last week. Father Phil Intintola: That new print is great, huh? Carmela Soprano: You know when Bogie says "Of all the lousy gin joints in the world, why did you have to pick mine."? Of all the finook priests in the world, why did I have to get the one who's straight? |
| Season 1 / Episode 5: - College Tony Soprano: [regarding Father Phil] What you guys do for twelve hours? Play, uh, "Name That Pope"? Carmela Soprano: He gave me communion. Tony Soprano: Oh, I bet he gave you communion. Carmela Soprano: Excuse me? Tony Soprano: Well, Carmela, the guy spends the night here with you and all he does is slip you a wafer? Carmela Soprano: That's verging on sacrilege. Tony Soprano: Oh, I didn't mean to verge. |
 | Season 1 / Episode 1: - The Sopranos Tony Soprano: Carmela, something I gotta confess. Tony Soprano: [sees Carmela moving her wine glass] What are you doin'? Carmela Soprano: Getting my wine in position to throw in your damn face! Tony Soprano: You're always with the drama, you. Carmela Soprano: Go ahead and confess already, please! Get it over with! Tony Soprano: [covers his face] I'm on Prozac. Carmela Soprano: Oh - Oh my God. Tony Soprano: I've been seeing a therapist. Carmela Soprano: [gasps] Oh my God! I think that's great! I think that's so wonderful! I think that's so gutsy! Tony Soprano: Alright, take it easy. Carmela Soprano: I just think that's very, very wonderful! Tony Soprano: You would think I was Hannibal Lecter before or something. |
 | Unknown Episode: Carmela Soprano: I think you should pay him, Tony. Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: No fucking way! Carmela Soprano: What, your daughter's future isn't worth 10,000 dollars? Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: That's not it. That motherfucker's full of shit. He's shaking me down. Carmela Soprano: No, he's not. Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Oh, yeah? Who knows more about extortion, me or you? |
| Unknown Episode: Carmela Soprano: I would have to get a lawyer, find an apartment, arrange for child support. Dr. Krakower: You're not listening. I'm not charging you because I won't take blood money. You can't either. One thing you can never say: You haven't been told. |
| Unknown Episode: Carmela Soprano: I know you better than anybody, Tony, even your friends. Which is probably why you hate me. |
| Unknown Episode: Carmela Soprano: [after finding A.J. was smoking weed on his confirmation] Get back in there to your guests! Be a good Catholic for fifteen fucking minutes! |
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