Col. Steve Austin

The Six Million Dollar Man

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Played by:

Lee Majors

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Col. Steve Austin Quotes

	Season 4 / Episode 6: - H+2+O = Death Lynda Wilson: [looking at her Fembot duplicate] Boy, it's spooky looking at myself. Doctor Rudy Wells: Not only that, do you know she weighs 482 pounds? Lynda Wilson: Well that teaches me one thing. Col. Steve Austin: Yeah? What's that? Lynda Wilson: I'd better go on a diet.
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - The Return of Bigfoot (1) Oscar Goldman: What do you think? Col. Steve Austin: Well, If I didn't know better, I would think a bionic man came through here. Oscar Goldman: You haven't gone into business for yourself, have you, pal?
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - Season 4, Episode 58 Oscar Goldman: What do you think? Col. Steve Austin: Well, If I didn't know better, I would think a bionic man came through here. Oscar Goldman: You haven't gone into business for yourself, have you, pal?
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - Season 4, Episode 01 Oscar Goldman: What do you think? Col. Steve Austin: Well, If I didn't know better, I would think a bionic man came through here. Oscar Goldman: You haven't gone into business for yourself, have you, pal?
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - The Return of Bigfoot (1) Col. Steve Austin: I don't know. It's... it's like there's something there. I can almost remember, but not quite... it's frustrating. Jamie Sommers: Tell me about it. I'm the one who wrote the book on partial memory, remember?
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - Season 4, Episode 58 Col. Steve Austin: I don't know. It's... it's like there's something there. I can almost remember, but not quite... it's frustrating. Jamie Sommers: Tell me about it. I'm the one who wrote the book on partial memory, remember?
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - Season 4, Episode 01 Col. Steve Austin: I don't know. It's... it's like there's something there. I can almost remember, but not quite... it's frustrating. Jamie Sommers: Tell me about it. I'm the one who wrote the book on partial memory, remember?
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - The Return of Bigfoot (1) Nuclear Center Guard: Alright, freeze, mister. Hit the deck! Come on, hit the deck! Col. Steve Austin: Wait a minute, I'm Colonel Steve Austin. Nuclear Center Guard: I don't care if you're Nelson Rockefeller, hit the deck, come on!
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - Season 4, Episode 58 Nuclear Center Guard: Alright, freeze, mister. Hit the deck! Come on, hit the deck! Col. Steve Austin: Wait a minute, I'm Colonel Steve Austin. Nuclear Center Guard: I don't care if you're Nelson Rockefeller, hit the deck, come on!
	Season 4 / Episode 1: - Season 4, Episode 01 Nuclear Center Guard: Alright, freeze, mister. Hit the deck! Come on, hit the deck! Col. Steve Austin: Wait a minute, I'm Colonel Steve Austin. Nuclear Center Guard: I don't care if you're Nelson Rockefeller, hit the deck, come on!
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - The Secret of Bigfoot (2) Apploy: I am delighted to welcome you to our colony, especially since you are a fellow space traveler. Col. Steve Austin: Then you are really not from Earth? Apploy: As Shalon may have indicated to you, we come from a rather... eh, distant place. Faler: Distant to say the least.
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - The Secret of Bigfoot (2) Col. Steve Austin: You know doctor, when I first met you, your bedside manner did suprise me a little bit. You treat all your patients that way? Shalon: [laughs] Of course not, but I've been stuck here with those stuffy scientists for two years. You were like a breath of fresh air. Not only attractive and witty, but also bionic. My specialty.
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - The Secret of Bigfoot (2) Col. Steve Austin: [referring to Sasquatch] Have you made others like him? Shalon: No, he's my baby.
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - The Secret of Bigfoot (2) Shalon: [about to erase part of Steve's memory] You will not be forgotten. Col. Steve Austin: I wish I could say the same.
	Season 3 / Episode 17: - The Secret of Bigfoot (1) Oscar Goldman: [looking at a giant footprint] What is it, a mountain lion? Col. Steve Austin: No, it's too big. What do you think, a huge grizzly, Tom? Tom Raintree: No. No, not a cat. Not a grizzly. Oscar Goldman: Well, what is it? Tom Raintree: There's only one thing in the mountains that leaves a track like this. The creature of legend that roams the Timberline. My people named him Sasquatch. You call him... Bigfoot.
	Season 3 / Episode 17: - The Secret of Bigfoot (1) Shalon: You're really very special, Colonel Austin. Are there many more of you? Col. Steve Austin: ...Yes, there's a whole army of us. Shalon: [sensors start beeping] Now Colonel, you and I both know that's not true, don't we?
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Col. Steve Austin: Collins, where would he keep such a notebook? Will Collins: Well, normally in his safe, but then, he hasn't been too normal lately.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Col. Steve Austin: [about to show Oscar a card trick] At no time will my fingers leave my hands.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Col. Steve Austin: Audrey, you don't have to use that gift of yours all the time. Like I don't have to use bionics. Now if I wanna get to the second floor of a department building, I don't leap up, I can take an elevator.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Col. Steve Austin: [Audrey is giggling at Steve Austin's disguise] What's so funny? Audrey Moss: You look like Clark Gable. Col. Steve Austin: That's enough, Scarlett.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Col. Steve Austin: [as magician Steve Andrews] Aha, the magic cube. Won't you join us, magic cube?
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Audrey Moss: We really make a super pair, don't we? Col. Steve Austin: We do sure do.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Hocus-Pocus Col. Steve Austin: Here you are, my lady, the pumpkin ride is over. Audrey Moss: Oh, gee and I didn't even get to keep my glass slippers. Oh well, thanks for the ride. Col. Steve Austin: I just wanted to make sure you didn't run away for a wicked life on the stage. Make sure you got back on the groove. Audrey Moss: Yeah, back in the groove...
	Season 3 / Episode 15: - Welcome Home, Jaime (1) Jaime Sommers: How did you and I first meet? Col. Steve Austin: Well, it was my first day in the third grade and you dared me to eat one of everything in the cafeteria. Jaime Sommers: Did I? Did you? Col. Steve Austin: Yeah, I tried and I got pretty sick. But I got even with you right here on this swing. Jaime Sommers: Yeah, what'd you do, stick a frog down my back? Col. Steve Austin: [sits down on swing] No, it was a lizard. Jaime Sommers: Ew! That's an awful thing to do.
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - The Bionic Criminal Col. Steve Austin: Why are you doing it? Why make another Bionic timebomb?
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - The Bionic Criminal Col. Steve Austin: Oscar, don't you realize that a bionic man turned criminal how much he could steal? He could burrow into Fort Knox. Oscar Goldman: I don't want to think about it.
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - The Bionic Criminal Lester Burstyn: You show amazing strength, Colonel Austin. Anyone who can hold his own with a bionic man... Col. Steve Austin: Well I keep in shape.
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - The Bionic Criminal Barney Hiller: I thought you'd never show up. Col. Steve Austin: Well, after what you did to my neck, I wasn't sure I would.
	Season 3 / Episode 3: - The Return of the Bionic Woman (1) Doorman: Morning, Colonel Austin. Col. Steve Austin: Mornin' Doorman: You're up awfully early for Sunday. Col. Steve Austin: Well, I got a speach to write this morning. The way I write 'em, I gotta get an early start, you know?
	Season 3 / Episode 3: - The Return of the Bionic Woman (2) Doorman: Morning, Colonel Austin. Col. Steve Austin: Mornin' Doorman: You're up awfully early for Sunday. Col. Steve Austin: Well, I got a speach to write this morning. The way I write 'em, I gotta get an early start, you know?

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