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![]() | Season 9 / Episode 17: - Lisa the Simpson Homer Simpson: I rounded up every Simpson in the tri-city area so I can prove to you there's nothing wrong with the Simpson genes. This is your great uncle Chet. Go ahead, Chet, tell her what you do. Great Uncle Chet: I run an unsuccessful shrimp company. Homer Simpson: [nervously] Oh... but you *run* it, right? Great Uncle Chet: [smugly] Oh, yeah. Homer Simpson: Okay... uh, this is your second cousin, Stanley! Cousin Stanley: Um, I shoot birds at the airport. Homer Simpson: [More nervously] Everybody hates birds, right? [Homer frantically looks for a successful relative and spots a dapper man smoking a cigar.] You look pretty successful! Simpson Relative 1: Thanks! I play a millionaire at parties. [sighs defeatedly] At least, I'd like to. Bart Simpson: You probably should have researched this first, eh dad? Homer Simpson: What about you? Simpson Relative 2: Well, sir, I step in front of cars and sue the drivers. Simpson Relative 3: I beg celebrities for money! Simpson Relative 4: I'm a prison snitch. Simpson Relative 5: Jug band manager. Simpson Relative 6: My legs hurt. |
![]() | Season 13 / Episode 10: - Half-Decent Proposal Marge Simpson: I haven't lost so much sleep since little Barty had the scoots. Dr. Hibbert: Well, there's a surgical option, but it's not cheap. [Writes something on a slip of paper, and slides it across his desk to Homer] Here's what it costs. Homer Simpson: [Reads paper] Interesting. Here's my counter-offer. [Writes something on the paper and gives it back to Hibbert] Dr. Hibbert: [Reads. The note says, "Do it for free"] [Chuckles, then turns very serious] Get out. |
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