The Practice Quotes

The Practice

- Episode Quotes

Fun Facts:

	Season 8 / Episode 17: - War of the Roses (2) Alan Shore: It's not that I didn't appreciate your riveting performance, but I've mainly retained you to sit at the table as honorary friend of the judge. Denny Crane: Let me tell you something, tiger. Alan Shore: Tiger? Denny Crane: You want Denny Crane to talk. When Denny Crane talks, E.F. Hutton listens. My presence alone - my presence is so powerful, I don't even have to talk. Sometimes I'm better when I don't talk. Alan Shore: This was my thinking. Denny Crane: I'm Denny Crane, damn it!
	Season 8 / Episode 10: - Equal Justice Alan Shore: To err is human, but to get even? THAT is divine.
	Season 7 / Episode 5: - Neighboring Species Maxine Shipp: [standing outside Lindsay's new office] But, actually, I think I have heard of you. Aren't you the lady who shot somebody? Lindsay Dole: I did. But I beat it... on a technicality. Come on in. Maxine Shipp: OK. Uhhh... it wasn't a client you shot, right?
	Season 6 / Episode 20: - Eat and Run Lawrence O'Malley: [believing himself to be Hannibal Lector as he speaks to Lindsay through her open apartment door] You'll go to heaven... and I will take you there myself. Lindsay Dole: [pointing her gun at him] Know what? Why don't you go on ahead without me.
	Season 6 / Episode 19: - The Return of Joey Heric Lindsay Dole: And, sir, can you tell the court why you would eat these women? Lawrence O'Malley: Because they were so beautiful. Like you. The book of Genesis tells us that woman came from man. When man consumes the woman it makes him one with her... and by eating them, I know they will go to heaven because I am going to heaven, and they will go with me. [looking directly at Lindsay] You'll be going to heaven, Clarice.
	Season 6 / Episode 19: - The Return of Joey Heric Lawrence O'Malley: [to his lawyer, Lindsay Dole, after he has asked to speak to her, alone, in a conference room at the court house] Hello, Clarissa. Bobby Donnell: Oh, brother! Lawrence O'Malley: Could you leave, Bobby? I'd like to speak to Clarissa alone. Lindsay Dole: I'm not Clarissa, Lawrence. Jody Foster wasn't even Clarissa. She was Clarice. And even she's not Clarice anymore.
	Season 6 / Episode 18: - Fire Proof Eugene Young: Wait, wait, wait... you went to law school, took the bar exam. Joey Heric: It was my therapist's idea. He thought one way of weaning myself off of killing people was to help others who did get away with it. I've got a case now. That's why I'm here. Bobby Donnell: What kind of case? Joey Heric: Homicide! The problem I'm having is this... I think the kid might actually be innocent. And as good as I am, my conscience says I should bring someone else on board with experience. Ellenor Frutt: So, in addition to getting a law degree, you also picked up a conscience? Joey Heric: Drives like new, hardly any miles on it.
	Season 6 / Episode 10: - Inter Arma Silent Leges Ellenor Frutt: [talking to her client, Maynard Parish, in his jail cell] You promised me you'd stop shoplifting! Maynard Parish: I didn't boost nothin'... I'm innocent this time! Ellenor Frutt: You're innocent... Maynard Parish: Yes! Ellenor Frutt: You had the stereo in your coat. Maynard Parish: That was a present for my mom's birthday. No... h-h-how can it be stealin' if it's for someone else? Ellenor Frutt: OK... THAT'S a defense we're NOT putting on.
	Season 4 / Episode 9: - Bay of Pigs A.D.A. Richard Bay: I'm only talking about a humane way of getting the testimony. This does nothing to my burden ... Eugene Young: We won't agree. Get an order if you want, but like Ellenor says, we aren't about to make things easier. A.D.A. Richard Bay: How stupid of me to expect you people to be decent or humane. You think you're heroes, playing a part in the criminal justice system, the crusaders against depression. Well, you might have started out that way but look at you now. The day to day stench of your clients has rubbed off, you're every bit as vile and contaminated as the murderers and rapists you defend! You bring no dignity to law, you proffer disgrace. Where you might once have been noble, you've- you've sunk into a sinkhole of disrepute where your only idealism is get the guy off even when it offends human nature, where it insults morality! You're so lost in the inferno of crime and dishonor, you become sickening animals, repugnant to everything that's good about this country, everything this nation celebrates in the spirit of humanity! You are sick, awful vehicles of hate! If there is a god, he will get you, you sleazy, cancerous, infected, malignant, grotesque snakes!
	Season 3 / Episode 23: - Happily Ever After Bobby Donnell: My client isn't a flight risk, your honor. A.D.A. Curtis Simmons: Safety risk. Bobby Donnell: This is the first time he's ever shot anybody. [Judge Hiller looks at him, shocked at such a slip-up. Bobby catches himself] Allegedly.
	Season 3 / Episode 5: - The Battlefield Judge Warren West: Your client allegedly cut off a woman's head, Mr. Young, are you afraid the jury will think less of him because of his film library?
	Season 2 / Episode 26: - Axe Murderer (2) Ally McBeal: Lizzie Borden took an axe, gave her mother 40 whacks. Born again in '61, killed her husband just for fun.
	Unknown Episode: Bobby Donnell: It's better that ten guilty men go free, than one innocent man suffer.
	Unknown Episode: Eugene Young: Bobby, if stupidity were a crime, your ass would be in jail for life!
	Unknown Episode: Richard Bay: What Mr. Donnell is saying is he doesn't trust juries. Well, that's the system of this country. And if it displeases him, perhaps he should move to Cuba.
	Unknown Episode: Judge Zoey Hiller: Mr. Bay, did you see the sign, "Check your soapbox at the door"?
	Unknown Episode: Joey Heric: Helen, can I call you Helen? Helen: No. Joey Heric: Okay, Dorothy.
	Unknown Episode: Ellenor: This is a no-brainer, what's stopping you? Lindsay: Some of us have brains.
	Unknown Episode: Judge Roberta Kittleson: Let me be frank. The defendant is world-class scum. I'm sure he's guilty of the crime. Eugene Young: Well, I'm glad you have an open mind. Judge Roberta Kittleson: Oh please. A mind is like a wound. If it's too open, you get an infection.
	Unknown Episode: Judge Roberta Kittleson: I'm sorry, Mr. Bay. I'm not going to allow the prosecution to call defense counsel to impeach a state's witness. You got a bad bounce. You'll just have to deal with it.
	Unknown Episode: Richard Bay: This is a total gyp.
	Unknown Episode: Helen: We'd all kill. It's just the circumstances that vary. Lindsay: Now there's a proverb.
	Unknown Episode: Bobby: What kind of fairness is this? You're putting the system before a person's life. Judge Hiller: Damn right I am. That's why I wear the robe.
	Unknown Episode: Lindsay: What am I, a pineapple?
	Unknown Episode: Helen Gamble: I need it, Richard. Give it to me. Richard Bay: What? Helen Gamble: The speech. Why we do what we do. Richard Bay: Oh, I am not really in the mood after... Helen Gamble: PLEASE, Richard. I NEED it. Please give it to me. And don't just phone it in. Richard Bay: Helen... Helen Gamble: Please! Can't you see how demoralized I am? Richard Bay: OK. (takes a deep breath) There are heroes in this world. They're called District Attorneys. They don't get to have clients, people who smile at them at the end of the trial, who look them in the eye and say, "thank you." Nobody is there to appreciate the District Attorney, because we work for the state. And our gratitude comes only from knowing there's a tide out there. A tide the size of a tsunami coming out of a bottomless cesspool. A tide called crime, which, if left unchecked will rob every American of his freedom. A tide which strips individuals of the privilege of being able to, to walk down a dark street or take twenty dollars out of an ATM machine without fear of being mugged. All Congress does is talk, but it's the District Attorney who grabs his sword, who digs into the trenches and fights the fight. Who dogs justice day, after day, after day without thanks, without so much as a simple pat on the back. But we do it. We do it, we do it because we are the crusaders, the last frontier of American justice. Knowing that if a man cannot feel safe, he can never, never feel free. Helen Gamble: Thank you.
	Unknown Episode: Client: I guess you can't ask someone to trust you after you've planned their death.
	Unknown Episode: Ellenor: Heads we take the plea, tails we go for it. [flips coin] Tails. We go for it. Lindsay: This is why we get paid. To make these decisions.
	Unknown Episode: Ellenor: Can't let an innocent man go to jail. Rebecca: We don't even let our guilty ones go there.
	Unknown Episode: Lindsay: Your style is kind of, you know, Queen Bitch Killer Bee. Doesn't harsh go with that? Helen: Why yes Lindsay, harsh would go with that...
	Unknown Episode: Lindsay: If you were in my position... Helen: I would NEVER be in your position. Lindsay: Hey! Helen: Go to hell. Lindsay: You go to hell.

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