Niles

The Nanny

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Characters: #3 of 10 (Full List)

Played by:

Daniel Davis
This Arkansas native was born on 26 November 1945 to parents who owned a movie theater. He often felt ...

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Niles Quotes

	Season 6 / Episode 20: - The Baby Shower Maxwell Sheffield: [about Fran and her pregnancy] Ever since she entered her third trimester, her mood swings have been lethal. Niles: Oh, I know. It's worse than when Sylvia gave up chocolate. That was the most unbearable hour of my life.
	Season 6 / Episode 20: - The Baby Shower Fran Drescher: Are you two here on vacation? Niles: [pointing to Fran] Oh no, we're here spying on her husband who's having an affair with my girlfriend. Fran Drescher: [about her television show] Oh, we did that very same story this season. Fran Sheffield: Really?! I didn't see that. When was it on? Fran Drescher: Now! Don't forget to watch the series finale next week. Fran Sheffield: Oh, I wouldn't miss it for the world, unless of course that's the night I'm having my twins.
	Season 6 / Episode 16: - The Producers (1) Niles: What is the one thing that separates me from all the successful people in this world? Fran Sheffield: Success?!
	Season 6 / Episode 16: - The Producers (1) Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: [sternly] What do I have to do to get some milk for my coffee? Niles: Hover over a bucket.
	Season 6 / Episode 15: - Ma'ternal Affairs (2) Maxwell Sheffield: Darling, "seeing" a doctor does not necessarily mean they're being intimate. Chastity Claire "C.C." Babcock: Oh, please! When I "see" a man you don't think I'm intimate with him? Niles: Not if he sees you.
	Season 6 / Episode 13: - The Yummy Mummy Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: I'm being taken out tonight. Niles: Oh, in that case, I'll open the drapes and give the gunman a cleaner shot.
	Season 6 / Episode 11: - The In-Law Who Came Forever Fran Sheffield: "What to expect in your eighth month: indigestion, heartburn, bloating, flatulence, nasal congestion." Ah, well, according to this, my entire family's pregnant. Niles: You know, the worst part about your pregnancy is going to be the mood swings. Fran Sheffield: Oh? Niles: I can get very testy.
	Season 6 / Episode 11: - The In-Law Who Came Forever Fran Sheffield: I just want to fuss over you like Ma does. Maxwell Sheffield: Yes, but if I wanted someone to cook and clean and fuss over me, I've had married Niles. Niles: [wearing a construction worker outfit] Oh, and you didn't think this look worked for me.
	Season 5 / Episode 22: - The Wedding (1) Maxwell Sheffield: Oh, Niles. I just hope I can live up to Fran's expectations. You know, I haven't been with a woman in quite some time. Niles: Well, double quite some time, add two, and welcome to my world, pal.
	Season 5 / Episode 21: - The Best Man Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Nanny Fine, about your wedding, I just came back from Crate and Barrel... Niles: Shopping for a dress?
	Season 5 / Episode 20: - The Pre-nup Maxwell Sheffield: I'm going to ask Fran to sign a pre-nuptial agreement. Niles: Why don't you just walk around downtown Iraq dressed as Uncle Sam?! It'll be quicker.
	Season 5 / Episode 15: - The Engagement Maxwell Sheffield: Oh, Niles, Niles. Come here. I want to tell you something. Niles: Uh-hm. Maxwell Sheffield: Niles, can you keep a secret? Niles: Well, I'm good until I meet another person.
	Season 5 / Episode 13: - Call Me Fran Fran Fine: [about her mother and father] One time, she bought this backless dress and he made her return it because it showed too much cleavage. Niles: Cut too low in the front? Fran Fine: You wish the front.
	Season 5 / Episode 13: - Call Me Fran Niles: [to C.C] In the risk of sounding like the doctor who delivered you, this could get ugly.
	Season 5 / Episode 9: - Educating Fran Niles: [to C.C] We can't all learn Spanish the way you did, chasing frightened tourists down the streets of Pamplona.
	Season 5 / Episode 7: - Mommy and Mai Niles: I assure you, I am the most masculine one in this room... Niles: ...until now.
	Season 5 / Episode 6: - A Decent Proposal Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Maxwell, I have found the perfect subject for our one person play. Niles: [to C.C] Your sex life?
	Season 5 / Episode 5: - The Ex-Niles Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Well, it's been five days, and I haven't lost a single pound on this damned liquid diet. Niles: Maybe because it's gin. Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Nanny Fine. How do you eat like that and stay so thin? Fran Fine: I have a very fast metabolism. Every time I think about how old I am and the fact that I'm still single, my heart starts racing.
	Season 4 / Episode 26: - Fran's Gotta Have It (1) Niles: I've been killing myself all week trying to drop a pound. How does Mr. Sheffield keep in shape? Fran Fine: Running from commitment.
	Season 4 / Episode 26: - Fran's Gotta Have It (1) Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: [sarcastically about Niles' obvious hair dye job] Smart, doing it gradually so no one would notice. Niles: Same way you became a woman.
	Season 4 / Episode 26: - Fran's Gotta Have It (1) Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: [about Maxwell] What's he doing in London? Niles: One would hope Miss Fine.
	Season 4 / Episode 24: - The Heather Biblow Story Niles: So, sir, how could I break this to you... Miss Fine has taken a job on a soap opera and she's not coming home. Maxwell Sheffield: What? A speaking part? [line repeated in the episode by various characters]
	Season 4 / Episode 21: - The Passed-Over Story Niles: Sylvia has invited us over for the Jewish holiday. Maxwell Sheffield: Now, is this the holiday Miss Fine said you can't eat all day, then stuff yourself? Or the one where you light candles, then stuff yourself? Or the one where you build a straw hut, then stuff yourself? Niles: I believe it's the one where you hide crackers from small children, then stuff yourself. Maxwell Sheffield: Ah, Passover.
	Season 4 / Episode 21: - The Passed-Over Story Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Maxwell, I don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth... Niles: Then don't floss in a mirror.
	Season 4 / Episode 20: - The Nanny and the Hunk Producer Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Now, what would I look really great in? Niles: A sealed mausoleum.
	Season 4 / Episode 19: - Fran's Roots Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: [to Maxwell] I have a friend at CBS who wants to buy our show and turn it into a TV series. Niles: Whoa, back up. You have a friend?
	Season 4 / Episode 18: - The Facts of Lice Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: [about Fran] She thinks you're a killer. She even thought you were trying to kill me. Niles: Oh, I wouldn't even dream of touching you, like any other normal man.
	Season 4 / Episode 18: - The Facts of Lice Fran Fine: I saw the list. You explain Secure Alibi. Niles: That was the title. Fran Fine: What about the morgue? Niles: I was doing research. Fran Fine: Well what about the bananas? Niles: I was making a pie! Fran Fine: ...Well where is it? Niles: Your mother was here.
	Season 4 / Episode 17: - Samson, He Denied Her Niles: [about Sylvia] You know, if Jimmy Hoffa had had a corned beef sandwich in his pocket, she'd have found him in a week.
	Season 4 / Episode 16: - The Bank Robbery Niles: Happy Valentine's Day, sir. Did you decide what to get for Miss Fine? Maxwell Sheffield: Yes. Nothing. Niles: Oh, you can't get her the same thing you got me.

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