The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air - Episode Quotes

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The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Quotes

	Season 6 / Episode 24: - I, Done (2) Will: I'm definitely gonna miss you C...
	Season 6 / Episode 17: - The Butler's Son Did It Phillip Banks: Jeffery, people Frederick's age don't play with toys. Will: Ooh Transformers! I been looking for Razorbeak since like, October!
	Season 6 / Episode 12: - Boxing Helena Helena: Yo mama! William 'Will' Smith: Mama said knock you out!
	Season 6 / Episode 8: - Viva Lost Wages Hilary Banks: I just know that someday Thelma and Louise will make it to the other end of the canyon. [Ashley and Vivian nod in agreement]
	Season 6 / Episode 8: - Viva Lost Wages William 'Will' Smith: I don't want to see no damn Hoover dam.
	Season 6 / Episode 8: - Viva Lost Wages Carlton Banks: I bet five on black and five on red. William 'Will' Smith: Carlton that cancels the bet, you can't win. Carlton Banks: Maybe so but I can't lose either. William 'Will' Smith: Unless it's...[roulette wheels hits 00]
	Season 6 / Episode 8: - Viva Lost Wages Carlton Banks: My they're pumping a lot of oxygen into this room!
	Season 6 / Episode 6: - Not, I Barbecue Counselor: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but a fifty foot fall will kill y'all.
	Season 6 / Episode 6: - Not, I Barbecue Counselor: Don't panic. I'm with the Crisis Intervention Unit. You're young; You're young. [pulls out an index card and reads it] 'And you have everything to live for.' William 'Will' Smith: Just get us down. Counselor: There you go putting the cart before the horse. [reads from the card again] Now hand me the baby. William 'Will' Smith: What you talking about, we ain't got no baby, man. Counselor: Oh. My bad. William 'Will' Smith: Get out of the way, fool! Counselor: Hey, there's no need for name calling. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a fifty foot fall will kill y'all. [smiles] I made that up myself. William 'Will' Smith: That civil service exam is real easy, isn't it?
	Season 6 / Episode 4: - Bourgie Sings the Blues Carlton Banks: What do you mean I didn't get the job? ...Budget problems? But I was volunteering!
	Season 6 / Episode 1: - Burnin' Down the House William 'Will' Smith: [Uncle Phil has Will in a headlock] Uncle Phil? Philip Banks: Yes, Will? William 'Will' Smith: Are you gonna let me go any time soon? Philip Banks: No, Will.
	Season 5 / Episode 19: - Slum Like It ... Not! William 'Will' Smith: Jazz, you're the person that's suing by uncle? Man, what were you thinking about? Jazz: I'm just trying to protect your investment. After you guys put a couple million dollars in this place, it'll be worth thousands!
	Season 5 / Episode 17: - Will is From Mars... Louise Jefferson: You're supposed to say three things you like about me George. George Jefferson: How 'bout this? Your mother's dead, your mother died, and your mother ain't living no more!
	Season 5 / Episode 17: - Will is From Mars... Louise Jefferson: The only thing stupid there, is your big-earred boyfriend. He looks like a car coming down the road with both doors open!
	Season 5 / Episode 17: - Will is From Mars... Philip Banks: Hi kids. Lisa Wilkes: Hi Mr. Banks. Would you like to join us for dinner? Philip Banks: As lovely as that stinks, uh smells, I'll pass.
	Season 5 / Episode 17: - Will is From Mars... Dr. Whitehorn: Hello, Louise, George. George Jefferson: Hello, Whitie. Dr. Whitehorn: No, it's Dr. Whitehorn. George Jefferson: Yeah, yeah, Horny, where do you want me to sit?
	Season 5 / Episode 15: - Bullets Over Bel-Air Will: Give me the gun Carlton. You owe me man I saved your life. Now give me the gun
	Season 5 / Episode 12: - Same Game, Next Season William 'Will' Smith: [to the audience] If we're so rich, why we can't afford no ceiling?
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Will Steps Out William 'Will' Smith: I'm stuck between buns of brass [Susan] and brains of brick. [Carlton]
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Will Steps Out William 'Will' Smith: Potato chips? Ashley, what about Susan Powters? Ashley Banks: Will, I'm as health conscious as the next person but when she threw out the strawberry Pop-Tarts, she went over the line.
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Will Steps Out William 'Will' Smith: [looking at his fat suit] Looks like Lorraina Bobbitt got to this suit, eh?
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Will Steps Out Susan Powter: You should try walking a mile in your uncle's shoes. William 'Will' Smith: My uncle can't walk a mile in my uncle's shoes.
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Will Steps Out Ashley Banks: Will, are you alright? William 'Will' Smith: Yeah why? Ashley Banks: You were just singing 'Lady' to a melon. William 'Will' Smith: That's how I check to see if they're ripe.
	Season 5 / Episode 10: - Will's Up a Dirt Road Jay Leno: Thank you Smith for clearing that up. I really appreciate it. William 'Will' Smith: Well well, my friends call me Will. Jay Leno: Thanks a lot Smith, I really appreciated it.
	Season 5 / Episode 7: - Father Knows Best Miss Sharpe: Oh, Mr. Smith, did you forget something? Will: Yes, I forgot to give you my direct line. Miss Sharpe: Look, I'm really flattered, but... Will: You know... that is quite an intoxicating fragrance. Miss Sharpe: Come closer. Will: Heyyyyyyy. Miss Sharpe: [moves closer to Will] That's a fake moustache! Will: No, it's not! Miss Sharpe: [rips off Will's fake moustache] Yes it is! Will: No, it's not! Miss Sharpe: Look, I don't know who you are, but I'm calling your real parents right now. Ashley: Will! Will: No, it's not! Ashley: Miss Sharpe... Will: It's not!
	Season 5 / Episode 4: - Grumpy Young Men William 'Will' Smith: I ought to knock your teeth out. Carlton Banks: Go ahead; they're on a glass next to my bed.
	Season 5 / Episode 3: - Reality Bites Will: [addressing the man in a "Dougie the Whale" costume] Now lookie here, you big, orange, Moby *Dick*.
	Season 4 / Episode 24: - Papa's Got a Brand-New Excuse Philip Banks: Carlton, am I a good father? Carlton Banks: Yes, you're the best! Now can I have early access to my trust fund? Philip Banks: Not a chance. Carlton Banks: I hate you!
	Season 4 / Episode 24: - Papa's Got a Brand-New Excuse Geoffrey: When I am depressed, I think of the poem my mother taught me when I was a lad - The master lives a life of ease while we live life upon our knees/Waste not your ears, nor your breath, for he will soon die a violent death.
	Season 4 / Episode 24: - Papa's Got a Brand-New Excuse Lou Smith: The day you were born was the happiest day of my life. When I held you, I thought I would never put you down. Hilary Banks: So why did you?