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Season 3 Breakdown
Normal Episodes: 138
TV Specials: 0
TV Movies: 0
Normal Episodes: 138
TV Specials: 0
TV Movies: 0
The Colbert Report Season 3 (2007)
 | 3x01 Ethan Nadelmann Stephen opens up the first episode of the new year talking about Saddam Hussein's execution and the democratic control of Congress. Segments include "The Word: Facts", "Who's Attacking ... | Jan. 08, 2007 |
 | 3x02 Jim Cramer Stephen congratulates former Archbishop of Warsaw Stanis?aw Wielgus for having a Catholic church scandal that wasn't sexually related; Demeans the Congressional Democrats for taking ... | Jan. 09, 2007 |
| 3x03 David Kamp Stephan berates President Bush for not taking his advice and send 300 million more men to Iraq, but will pardon him if "this is the only mistake he makes in this war." Introduces a ... | Jan. 10, 2007 |
| 3x04 Judy Woodruff Stephen challenges the audience with another "What Number is Stephen Thinking Of?" segment; talks with Ken Roth, executive director of Human Rights Watch while celebrating the 5th Anniversary ... | Jan. 11, 2007 |
| 3x05 Alex Kuczynski Stephen asks for a nationwide lie-in to refuse to engage in "anything at all" on this Martin Luther King's Birthday, ala Rosa Parks in her passive protest; attacks Senator Barbara Boxer ... | Jan. 15, 2007 |
| 3x06 Dinesh D'Souza Stephen a new segment of "Invasion of the Country Snatchers" is introduced focusing on immigration, such as a look at an Italian, anti-immigration Presidential candidate and a pizza ... | Jan. 16, 2007 |
| 3x07 Richard Clarke In anticipation of Bill O'Reilly's imminent arrival this week, Stephen brings in some of his most cherished items to spruce the set up. He trash talks with Lynn Swann against all the ... | Jan. 17, 2007 |
 | 3x08 Bill O'Reilly With Bill O'Reilly's arrival on the set, Stephen unveils a banner stating "Mission Accomplished." He talks about George Bush's plan to add more troops to Iraq; A look back at the weeks ... | Jan. 18, 2007 |
| 3x09 Tom Schaller Stephen is upset that the New Orleans Saints lost to a Chicago Bears team in which he refers to as "God-less killing Machines"; Stephen calls out Bill Clinton in a segment of "Who's ... | Jan. 22, 2007 |
| 3x10 Michael Steele Stephen announces that this is the second show taped that day so he can host a "State of the Union Address" party the following day. Russ Lieber discusses the Democratic controlled ... | Jan. 23, 2007 |
| 3x11 Lou Dobbs War on the Middle Class author Lou Dobbs sits for a one on one chat with Stephen. | Jan. 24, 2007 |
| 3x12 Mike Wallace Bill O'Reilly tells everyone what he thinks of Stephen and his show. Stephen has a chat with Saginaw Spirit Coach Bob Mancini and disagrees with his stand on the SMU dispute over Bush's ... | Jan. 25, 2007 |
| 3x13 Barry M. Lando Stephen won a bet after the Saginaw Spirit defeated Oshawa Generals, a junior hockey team in the Ontario Hockey League. Discusses the idea that Microsoft is paying for Wikipedia editing; ... | Jan. 29, 2007 |
| 3x14 Donna Shalala Stephen opens the show by showing a clip from Fox News' Fox and Friends, talking about the invisible beam that makes a person think he is on fire. Stephen then talks about how he stole ... | Jan. 30, 2007 |
| 3x15 Jed Babbin Stephen opens the show by discussing the "problem" with Global Warming and in protest replaces Bobby with a 5000 Watt heat lamp. This is followed by the return of the "On Notice" board ... | Jan. 31, 2007 |
| 3x16 Sen. Chuck Schumer Stephen comments on the 2007 Boston Mooninite Scare that occurred in Boston and laments the fact that he can no longer proceed with his obviously threatening-looking advertisements. ... | Feb. 01, 2007 |
| 3x17 Wendy Kopp Stephen is ecstatic at the slaughtering the Bears underwent in Super Bowl XLI. Also, he introduces a new product "Formula 419" (A combination of his Formula 401 and 18, Peyton Manning's ... | Feb. 05, 2007 |
| 3x18 Charlie LeDuff Stephen receives a message from Master Media International that they would be praying on his behalf on February 22. This is followed by the 40th installment of Better Know A District ... | Feb. 06, 2007 |
| 3x19 Steven Pinker Stephen starts by introducing a new segment, "California Values Watch". After addressing San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom's recent problems. Then talks about the controversy stirred ... | Feb. 07, 2007 |
| 3x20 Chris Hedges Stephen starts by talking about the astronaut incident on the news and especially that everyone talks about Lisa Nowak wearing a diaper, admitting that he too wears a diaper during ... | Feb. 08, 2007 |
| 3x21 Michael Oppenheimer Stephen starts by dancing/singing "My Humps" behind his desk and discusses Grammys. He then talks about criticism of the Iraq War transitioning into "The Word." This is followed by ... | Feb. 12, 2007 |
| 3x22 Sheryl WuDunn Colbert talks about the Chinese Menace, entitling a Colbert Report special report "Apocalypse Mao: Murdered By The Orient's Success". | Feb. 13, 2007 |
 | 3x23 Lance Armstrong Stephen makes correction, that the Chinese have four times more population than the US, not three. Colbert admonishes people teaching seniors about sex. Sport Report: about the Westminster ... | Feb. 14, 2007 |
 | 3x24 Shashi Tharoor Colbert talks about how Mastermedia International will pray for him on February 22nd. Asks J. J. Abrams how his prayer day went, with photo of Jimmie "J.J." Walker showing. Then he ... | Feb. 15, 2007 |
| 3x25 Zev Chafets Stephen compares Britain leaving Iraq to Britain leaving the U.S. and India - saying it will cause a flourish of Democracy. | Feb. 26, 2007 |
| 3x26 Dr. Craig Venter Stephen comments on a recent report about Al Gore's energy usage. Outdoor Life Magazine fires a columnist for calling for an assault rifle ban, an action Stephen commends in the Word. ... | Feb. 27, 2007 |
| 3x27 Nina Jablonski Colbert comments on how David Geffen has switched his support from Hillary Clinton to Barack Obama. Then he mentions how Tom Vilsack chickened out of the presidential race, and interviews ... | Feb. 28, 2007 |
| 3x28 Larry King Mr. Colbert thanks those who prayed for him last Thursday, with his prayer hat and foam fingers. Also he comments on the coverage of the Anna Nicole Smith story. Better Know A District ... | Mar. 01, 2007 |
| 3x29 Mara Vanderslice, Ben and Jerry Stephen comments on how many politicians have visited Walter Reed Hospital since the scandal. Ben and Jerry appeared to promote their new ice cream flavor named in honor of Stephen. ... | Mar. 05, 2007 |
 | 3x30 Mark Frauenfelder Stephen Colbert welcomes Make Magazine's editor Mark Frauenfelder. | Mar. 06, 2007 |
| 3x31 Michael Specter Colbert makes a rare correction about winning Mega Millions drawing, and calls his boss Sumner Redstone to grovel. The Word was about removing the military Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy. ... | Mar. 07, 2007 |
| 3x32 Ted Koppel Stephen wonders why the media is still discussing the Libby trial. Then he talks about the death of Captain America, and adds more in The Word. Better Know A District guest was John ... | Mar. 08, 2007 |
| 3x33 Nicholas D. Kristof Stephen upbraids Bill Gates for giving charitably to other nations while bemoaning America's faltering competitiveness. He retracts his disparaging comments about Captain America when ... | Mar. 12, 2007 |
| 3x34 Michael Eric Dyson Stephen closes the show by announcing The Word ("Goodnight"), after which the credits roll. | Mar. 13, 2007 |
| 3x35 Ed Viesturs Colbert introduces a new segment, "When Ancestors Attack." Then he mentions how Colorado has made John Denver's "Rocky Mountain High" their second official song. Sport Report: advice ... | Mar. 14, 2007 |
| 3x36 Ayaan Hirsi Ali Stephen celebrates the last St. Patrick's Day ever! Then he moves on to how Latin America has so many rabid admirers of President Bush, with comments from Esteban Colberto. In the 44th ... | Mar. 15, 2007 |
| 3x37 Jerome Groopman Stephen talks about the latest attack in DC, on him, by Rahm Emanuel.[2] The Word refers to South Carolina proposing to allow prisoners to donate organs to reduce jail time. Threatdown: ... | Mar. 19, 2007 |
| 3x38 Willie Nelson While unveiling threat # .5 as an addendum to yesterday's threatdown, Stephen finds himself in agreement with a German environmentalist over the euthanasia of Knut, a polar bear cub ... | Mar. 20, 2007 |
| 3x39 Benjamin Barber In the 45th installment of Better Know A District, the guest was Maurice Hinchey from New York's 22nd congressional district. | Mar. 21, 2007 |
| 3x40 Katie Couric Debate over DC-residents voting bill with Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes Norton. Criticism over Chicago Sun-Times face reading expert Rose Rosetree's interpretation of Stephen's facial ... | Mar. 22, 2007 |
| 3x41 John Perry Barlow Stephen expressed his anger that a severed mummy hand was recently sold at auction, but not to him; the hand was the earliest example of we're No. #1. In response to Rahm Emanuel's ... | Mar. 26, 2007 |
| 3x42 Madeleine Albright, James Fallows Stephen chided Sean Penn for his blunt criticism of the Bush administration. Stephen discusses Iran, specifically a clash over religion, with former US Secretary of State Madeleine ... | Mar. 27, 2007 |
| 3x43 Jabari Asim Stephen displayed his disappointment at the elimination of Paulina Porizkova from Dancing with the Stars, especially given that her husband Ric Ocasek is a friend of the show. Stephen ... | Mar. 28, 2007 |
| 3x44 Clive James First, Stephen questioned the necessity of the Equal Rights Amendment, since everyone should be on the honor system. Later, Stephen cited the promulgation of John McCain that Sadr City ... | Mar. 29, 2007 |
| 3x45 Colin Beavan, Katrina vanden Heuvel Colbert celebrates the 4th anniversary of the liberation of Baghdad, while he eats his "Stephen Colbert's Americone Dream" ice cream. He continues to eat it through the show. And announces ... | Apr. 09, 2007 |
| 3x46 Jeannette Walls Stephen scolded the 15 British sailors whom after recently returning from captivity in Iran were seeking to publish accounts of their experience. In "The Word", he talked about America's ... | Apr. 10, 2007 |
| 3x47 Vali Nasr Stephen introduced the latest eponymic animal, Stephanie Colburtle, one of the leatherback sea turtles being tracked from Costa Rica to the Galapagos Islands. In "The Word", Stephen ... | Apr. 11, 2007 |
| 3x48 Dr. Richard Land Stephen criticized Democratic senator Harry Reid for using "politicizing the war in Iraq" by citing a translation of a recent speech by Pope Benedict XVI. In "The Wørd," Stephen praised ... | Apr. 12, 2007 |
| 3x49 Sen. John Kerry Stephen begins by issuing a correction for having called Boyd K. Packer the "Mormon Pope" or "Mope," when he is more of a Mormon Cardinal, or "Mardinal." Colbert then compares Don Imus' ... | Apr. 16, 2007 |
| 3x50 Elaine Pagels Stephen announced that he will be having a metaphor-off with Sean Penn on Thursday's show. Update on Stephanie Colburtle the turtle who was in 2nd place at the time of broadcast on ... | Apr. 17, 2007 |
| 3x51 William Cohen On Who's NOT honoring me now, Stephen complained that he was not being awarded a Pulitzer Prize in journalism. In "The Word," Stephen suggested the corporate sponsorship of the War ... | Apr. 18, 2007 |
| 3x52 Gov. Mike Huckabee Stephen balks at a scientific study saying that chimpanzees are more evolved than humans in DNA. On "The Word," he talks about John Edwards' $400 haircut and considers him going over ... | Apr. 19, 2007 |
| 3x53 Russell Simmons [add summary] | Apr. 23, 2007 |
| 3x54 Dr. Andrew Weil The first act opens with a remembrance of Boris Yeltsin. Stephen continues with a combative interview with Eleanor Holmes Norton regarding a recent bill to give the District of Columbia ... | Apr. 24, 2007 |
| 3x55 David Walker Colbert decides that a new name is necessary for the long war, and comes up with Freemerican Victernity Made in China. He then backs the idea of having illegal immigrants fight in the ... | Apr. 25, 2007 |
| 3x56 Tom Wolfe Stephen is unhappy at the fact that Stephanie Colburtle The Turtle did not win The Great Turtle Race, after being bested by another turtle named Billy. He claims Billy is a male, and ... | Apr. 26, 2007 |
| 3x57 Bill Bradley "It's the last day of April. One more month 'till Speedo season! Do your squats. This is The Colbert Report." | Apr. 30, 2007 |
| 3x58 Malcolm Gladwell [add summary] | May. 01, 2007 |
 | 3x59 Gina Kolata [add summary] | May. 02, 2007 |
| 3x60 Conn Iggulden [add summary] | May. 03, 2007 |
| 3x61 Richard Preston [add summary] | May. 07, 2007 |
| 3x62 Nassim Nicholas Taleb [add summary] | May. 08, 2007 |
| 3x63 Salman Rushdie, Jane Fonda [add summary] | May. 09, 2007 |
| 3x64 Jann Wenner [add summary] | May. 10, 2007 |
| 3x65 William Langewiesche [add summary] | May. 14, 2007 |
| 3x66 Walter Isaacson [add summary] | May. 15, 2007 |
| 3x67 Howard Dean [add summary] | May. 16, 2007 |
| 3x68 Randy Kearse, Rep. Tom DeLay [add summary] | May. 17, 2007 |
| 3x69 Jared Diamond [add summary] | May. 21, 2007 |
| 3x70 John Amaechi [add summary] | May. 22, 2007 |
| 3x71 Bay Buchanan, Bob Deans [add summary] | May. 23, 2007 |
| 3x72 Jimmy Wales [add summary] | May. 24, 2007 |
| 3x73 Rep. Jan Schakowsky, Leon Botstein [add summary] | Jun. 04, 2007 |
| 3x74 Jessica Valenti [add summary] | Jun. 05, 2007 |
| 3x75 Carl Bernstein [add summary] | Jun. 06, 2007 |
Season 3 Characters
[More Cast] |
Season 3 Videos[none added] |
Season 3 Quotes
| Season 3 / Episode 96: - Robert Shrum Stephen Colbert: [about Nepal] I refuse to take guff from a country whose primary industry is carrying. |
| Season 3 / Episode 85: - Tom Hayden Stephen Colbert: Threat number two: Coral Reefs. According to microbiologists at Plymouth University in England, most of the world's coral reefs are riddled with herpes! Now, you're probably asking yourself, "How did the coral catch herpes?" Scientists blame humans for putting too much carbon into the oceans. But that doesn't answer the basic question: Who's been fucking the coral reefs? That's no where in their report. I looked. Now, I'm not surprised by this development. I've always found coral reefs to be the sluts of the sea, the way they dazzle us with their tropical colors, letting any ol' trigger fish make a home in their crevices. So SCUBA divers, for your protection, put a wet suit on that thing. |
Season 3 Trivia[none added] |
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