The Charmings Quotes

The Charmings

- Episode Quotes

Fun Facts:

	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: According to a panel of experts, "you should never yell at your children when you're angry." Eric Charming: Why would you want to yell at them if you're not?
	Unknown Episode: The Mirror: [Lillian enters her magic spells into the computer] You're gonna throw away your book and trust your spells to that machine? Queen Lillian White: Why not? It has spell-check!
	Unknown Episode: Don 'King of Carpets' Miller: I can't believe it. You really are Prince Charming! And you're Snow White! I wonder if Alf is real too.
	Unknown Episode: Don 'King of Carpets' Miller: Well, maybe you kids ought to think about finding a man for Lillian. You know, fix her up. Eric Charming: We'd have to fix her up. No one'd want her the way she is now.
	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: What kind of men would be right for Mother? He'd have to be dashing. Eric Charming: He'd have to be stupid. Snow White Charming: He'd have to be handsome. Eric Charming: He'd have to be blind. Snow White Charming: He'd have to be powerful, exciting, mysterious... Eric Charming: And out of his fiddlesticking mind!
	Unknown Episode: The Mirror: They just want to see you happy. Queen Lillian White: Then they should spontaneously combust!
	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: I'm a great matchmaker. After all, who set up Jack and Jill? Eric Charming: Oh, you did, Snow. Then they went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown, sued the water company, got a huge settlement and then ran off with that slut, Little Bo Peep!
	Unknown Episode: The Mirror: You may think you're hot stuff, but you're taking Lillian to Hell over my dead body! Jack: Okey-doke. The Mirror: Let me rephrase that.
	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: So, did you two go out for breakfast this morning? Jack: No, we just came in from dinner last night.
	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: Mother, we just wanted you to find someone and get married, not suffer eternal damnation. Jack: What's the difference?
	Unknown Episode: Virginia: Let's talk about us. Eric Charming: I beg your pardon. Virginia: You'd look great in Saran Wrap!
	Unknown Episode: Queen Lillian White: [Lillian casts a spell] Let's see those tramps from Oz top that!
	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: Besides, Elliot's gay. Eric Charming: Well of course he is, he's with you all the time! Snow White Charming: No, honey.... Eric Charming: Oh! Oh, you mean like Tweedledum and Tweedledee!
	Unknown Episode: Queen Lillian White: Well, I've got to find a way to make some money. I couldn't find the goose that lays the golden eggs, I can't spin straw into gold -- and where's Midas when you need him? The Mirror: Selling mufflers.
	Unknown Episode: Queen Lillian White: Double, double, toil and trouble. Wilma, Fred and Barney Rubble!
	Unknown Episode: Sally Miller: Oh, Don, why don't you lend Eric our electric hedge trimmer? Eric Charming: Well, thank you very much, but we don't have an electric hedge.
	Unknown Episode: Eric Charming: Actually, Don, I could use some advice. Don 'King of Carpets' Miller: Shoot. Eric Charming: No, no, guns won't help.
	Unknown Episode: Queen Lillian White: Why did I have to wake up? I should never have got out of bed. I was having such lovely nightmares!
	Unknown Episode: Queen Lillian White: Oh, you're kissing, how lovely! Do you know how many germs there are in the human mouth?
	Unknown Episode: Eric Charming: There's not gonna be a happy ending... Snow White Charming: Now, remember when Jack traded his cow for those magic beans? Everyone thought that he got cheated, but the next day, there was that beanstalk to prove they were wrong. Eric Charming: Snow, the man got stepped on by a giant!
	Unknown Episode: Cory Charming: Boy... dad's really upset! He's using words I've never heard him use before... like 'Fiddlesticks'. Snow White Charming: The 'F' word!
	Unknown Episode: Luther: You are an evil, vicious, spiteful old woman. Queen Lillian White: I am not old!
	Unknown Episode: The Mirror: Who'd want to go out with you? Queen Lillian White: Who wouldn't? I'm beautiful, cultured, interesting... The Mirror: You poison people. Queen Lillian White: Tell me that's not interesting!
	Unknown Episode: Rhonda: I'm a hairdresser. Eric Charming: Really? What exactly do you dress a hare in?
	Unknown Episode: The Mirror: [When a juggler throws balls into the air, Lillian magically makes them vanish] Lillian, give the nice man his balls back!
	Unknown Episode: Eric Charming: Do you know you're as beautiful as the first time I saw you? Snow White Charming: Awww, the first time you saw me, I was dead!
	Unknown Episode: Don 'King of Carpets' Miller: Sally, the man's wearing tights. Sally Miller: On him, it works!
	Unknown Episode: Queen Lillian White: Oh, kids can be so cruel... that's what I like about them!
	Unknown Episode: Snow White Charming: [referring to Lillian] Mother's spells run hot and cold. Maybe she is going through the change? Queen Lillian White: How dare she insult my witchcraft! Oh, is it hot in here? The Mirror: Well, Lillian, let's examine the evidence first. You get us stuck here, now you've brought Cinderella. Next I suppose it will be Goldilocks and The Three Bears, then what are you going to do? Queen Lillian White: We'll buy some porridge... OK?
	Unknown Episode: Fairy Godmother: Cinderella always has a happy ending, and so do Snow White and Prince Charming Snow White Charming: You mean we can all go back to the Enchanted Forrest? Fairy Godmother: Of course, I have my pumpkin coach right outside. Eric Charming: Snow, did you hear that? Snow White Charming: We can go home. Fairy Godmother: Now everyone hurry and pack because the coach turns into a pumpkin at the stroke of 11. Eric Charming: I thought it was midnight? Fairy Godmother: That's EFT "Enchanted Forest Time"

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