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Lt. Colonel John Sheppard Quotes
 | Season 5 / Episode 17: - Infection Dr. Jennifer Keller: The disease is in the ship? Todd the Wraith: It is the only explanation that makes sense. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: All right, if you say so. Dr. Jennifer Keller: How is that even possible? Todd the Wraith: During the process of hibernation, there is a continuous exchange of fluid between Wraith and Hive.The disease must have been transmitted in this manner. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Great, so we're flyin' around in a giant tumour. |
 | Season 5 / Episode 14: - Prodigal Dr. Rodney McKay: That's Atlantis' self destruct. Michael's gonna blow up the city. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: How much time do we have? Dr. Rodney McKay: He set it for 10 minutes. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: How much time do you need before you get those drones working? Dr. Rodney McKay: Well, if I can get them working at all, a lot more than 10 minutes. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: All right, forget about it. Dr. Rodney McKay: What are you doing? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I'm flying the Jumper. I'm crashing it into the tower. Dr. Rodney McKay: Crash it? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Look, it is our best chance of taking out Michael's Jumper. Dr. Rodney McKay: Not to mention taking out yourself! Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I have crashed Jumpers into the tower before! |
 | Season 5 / Episode 13: - Inquisition Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: You gonna tell me how you managed to pull this one off? Richard Woolsey: Well, I'd say it was a combination of things. My legal skills, my eloquence, the indisputable logic of my arguments... and the bribe I offered Kelore. |
 | Season 5 / Episode 12: - Outsiders Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Jervis taken care of? Teyla Emmagan: He and his men have been locked up. They will not be giving us any more trouble though I do not think it was necessary to stun them. Ronon Dex: Felt good, though. |
 | Season 5 / Episode 8: - The Queen Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Fruit bowl. Nice touch. Todd the Wraith: We picked them up on our travels. I thought it would make our discussions more comfortable. I hope they prove as delicious as the farmers who grew them. |
 | Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Jeannie Miller: Why the hell didn't you tell me my brother was this far gone? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It all happened pretty fast, Jeannie. Jeannie Miller: No... I got a message from him just a couple of weeks ago. He seemed perfectly fine; he'd never been so nice. Dr. Jennifer Keller: That would have been shortly after he became infected. I didn't recognize the symptoms in time. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It's not your fault, doc. Richard Woolsey: Frankly Mrs. Miller, we contacted you as soon as we became aware of the seriousness of his condition. In fact, Daedalus dropped you off in the first available gate in Pegasus because we were concerned that you wouldn't make it here in time. We thought you deserved a chance to say goodbye. |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Richard Woolsey: Dr. Keller wanted to take a moment to prepare him for your visit. Jeannie Miller: Yeah, I think I need a moment myself. How did this happen to him? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: There was a little snafu on our last mission. |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Richard Woolsey: Colonel Sheppard, when you reach the research camp, please remind Dr. Nichols that he is now one hour and fifteen minutes overdue for his scheduled check-in. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Alright. Want me to smack him around or anything? Richard Woolsey: Just the reminder please. Teyla Emmagan: Shouldn't we be concerned for Dr. Nichols' team? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: No. The settlement's a half hour away from the gate and Woolsey's got him checking in every six. I'm sure Nichols is just tired of taking the round trip. Dr. Rodney McKay: Still, wouldn't hurt to bust his chops a bit. That Nichols is so arrogant. |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [the team emerged from a Stargate that was unexpectedly underwater and is stuck on top] . Alright, everybody. We'll be warm soon enough. Dr. Rodney McKay: I think I got wetter than you did. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I don't know. I think I got a little damp dialing the DHD. Teyla Emmagan: The research camp is further up this valley. I'm a little concerned for Dr. Nichols' team. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [into radio] Anyone at the research camp, this is Colonel Sheppard, please respond. I repeat, this is Colonel Sheppard, please respond. Dr. Rodney McKay: I'm pretty sure they're all dead. Teyla Emmagan: We can't know that Rodney! |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Dr. Rodney McKay: [in a hospital bed] Hey, can I go now? I feel a little silly lying here. Dr. Jennifer Keller: I'm keeping you under observation for a little longer. Besides, I ordered you dinner. Dr. Rodney McKay: Well, then you can observe me eat, because I'm famished. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It's official: he's better. |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Richard Woolsey: I think you've just made a case for my proposal to send a MALP ahead of every single transit. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Stuff happens, Woolsey. And by stuff, I mean... Richard Woolsey: I know what you mean, thank you. |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Dr. Rodney McKay: Jennifer says it's gonna get worse now, almost by the hour. In a week or so, I won't even remember my own name. How's about... How 'bout we say goodbye now? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: No. Dr. Rodney McKay: What do you mean, no? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I mean I'm not saying goodbye. Dr. Rodney McKay: I'm saying it anyway. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Then I'm not listening. Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah, but pretty soon I won't even know who you are. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Well I'll remind you. Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah but I don't want you to see me like that. I want you to remember me as I am, as your genius friend, not as some shi... Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: -NOT happening. Dr. Rodney McKay: Please. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: You're stuck with me, Rodney, just accept it. Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah bu... Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: No! And that's final. Dr. Rodney McKay: Okay. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Okay. Dr. Rodney McKay: [meaningful pause] You're a good friend, Arthur. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [Looks over, sees McKay is joking, and spits out his beer laughing] |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I'm not going anywhere. You know, you wanna hang out, you just hang out. Dr. Rodney McKay: I don't know what to do with myself. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have woken you up. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Look, it's a nice night out. Let's go have some beer on the pier, okay? Dr. Rodney McKay: I drink beer? |
| Season 5 / Episode 6: - The Shrine Dr. Rodney McKay: Absolutely not. Jeannie Miller: We're talking about saving your life. Dr. Rodney McKay: [brandishing the drill] Look, my brain is not some new deck off the back of your house. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I'm not the one doing the surgery. Dr. Rodney McKay: [to Keller] Yeah, and as my parting advice, you need to stop letting these guys talk you into doing stupid things. Dr. Jennifer Keller: I can do it. Dr. Rodney McKay: Really? Jeannie Miller: And I'm fairly sure I can modify the life signs detector. Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah, with my help. Jeannie Miller: So help. Dr. Rodney McKay: Look, this isn't one of those PBS brain surgeries where my scull is open and we're having a conversation... Dr. Jennifer Keller: I have enough anesthetic to put you out, you're not gonna feel a thing. Dr. Rodney McKay: It's probably a *hammer*. |
 | Season 5 / Episode 2: - The Seed Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: How's Ronon? Richard Woolsey: He has a bruised larynx. Apparently he won't be able to speak for several days. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Wonder if anyone will notice the difference? |
 | Season 5 / Episode 1: - Search and Rescue (2) Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I'm gonna stop making fun of combat engineers as of today, I promise. Harris up there with you? Muffled voice: Yes, he's here. Don't worry, we'll have you out soon. Ronon Dex: I thought Harris was on leave until next month. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [Sheppard nods] If we get out of here, beer's on me, boys. What do you like, uh, Duff Beer or Oprah Ale? Muffled voice: Duff. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Well, they don't watch The Simpsons or drink beer. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 20: - The Last Man (1) Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: You're telling me I just travelled 48,000 years into the future in ten seconds? Dr. Rodney McKay: I know. It's kind of cool when you think about it, isn't it? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Surfing a thirty foot wave in Waimei is cool. Dating a supermodel is cool. This is not cool! |
 | Season 4 / Episode 19: - The Kindred (2) Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I'm tired of getting shot at with our own guns. Dr. Carson Beckett: I'm generally not fond of it regardless of the weapon. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 14: - Harmony Dr. Rodney McKay: You gonna eat your power bar? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Yes, Rodney. Told you, shouldn't have eaten yours so early in the day. Dr. Rodney McKay: I'm starving! Usually Flora feeds us some sort of food when we visit. Come on, you hardly ever eat yours. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: No, Rodney! Dr. Rodney McKay: Well, will you give it to me later when you decide you're not gonna eat it? Harmony: You allow him to question you so incessantly? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I guess I'm just used to it by now. Harmony: Would it not be easier to beat him? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: We don't beat people where we come from. Harmony: Why not? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Well, we find it's not very effective in the long run... unfortunately. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 13: - Quarantine Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: We could be here a while. [looks at a pregnant Teyla] Teyla Emmagan: What? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It's just every time one of these things happen in the movies the pregnant woman goes into labor. Teyla Emmagan: I'm still long way from my due day. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: That's the same thing in the movies and then wham! |
| Season 4 / Episode 13: - Quarantine Teyla Emmagan: Can anyone do it? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: They'd have to know Rodney's password. Fortunately I do. Teyla Emmagan: He told you his password? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: He didn't think I'd remember it. 16431879196842. See, didn't take a genius. Teyla Emmagan: I-it doesnt... Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: 1643 is the year Isaac Newton was born, 1879 Einstein and 1968... Teyla Emmagan: ...the year Rodney was born. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Never underestimate the size of that man's ego. Teyla Emmagan: Wait, weren't there other numbers? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: 42 Teyla Emmagan: What is that? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It's the ultimate answer to the great question of life, the universe and everything. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 11: - Be All My Sins Remember'd (2) Colonel Steven Caldwell: [Colonels of both earth ships beam into the control room of atlantis. To Ellis] Colonel. Colonel Abe Ellis: [to Caldwell] Colonel. Colonel Steven Caldwell: [to Samantha] Colonel. Colonel Samantha Carter: [to both] Colonels. Colonel Abe Ellis: [to Sheppard] Colonel. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [to both] Colonels. Dr. Rodney McKay: What, seriously? |
| Season 4 / Episode 11: - Be All My Sins Remember'd (2) Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [repeating Rodney] A, Superdence... blob. That's your great idea. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 10: - This Mortal Coil (1) Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Do we know what the problem is? Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah, the Gate's not working. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I think we figured that much last week when you broke it. |
| Season 4 / Episode 10: - This Mortal Coil (1) Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Last time I came face to face with myself, I ended up kicking my own ass. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 9: - Miller's Crossing Dr. Rodney McKay: Say, you and I are about even when it comes to looks, right? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Who's been lying to you? Dr. Rodney McKay: No, I'm serious. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I am, too. Who's been lying to you? |
| Season 4 / Episode 9: - Miller's Crossing Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Where're you going? Ronon Dex: To get some food. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Well, in case you forgot, McKay and his sister are still missing. Ronon Dex: What, you want my help dissecting corporate structures? When you find someone to point a gun at, you let me know. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 4: - Doppelganger Ronon Dex: [Ronon is hacking through a jungle] What are we doing? Dr. Rodney McKay: Exploring the Pegasus galaxy. It's what we do. Ronon Dex: You know what I mean. Teyla Emmagan: There certainly doesn't appear to be anything here that would help in our fight against the Wraith or the Replicators. Dr. Rodney McKay: Come on, you guys kill me. Planets are huge, you know! Ronon Dex: Yeah, and usually you're the one complaining. Teyla Emmagan: Yes, this enthusiasm is most unlike you, Rodney. Dr. Rodney McKay: I'm turning over a new leaf. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: We did the standard flyover in the Jumper, scanning for life signs. Nothing. Dr. Rodney McKay: You can't fly around for ten minutes and decide there's nothing here. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Yes I can! |
| Season 4 / Episode 4: - Doppelganger Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Looks like ones of those toys you played with as a kid. Dr. Rodney McKay: Commodore 64? Ronon Dex: Triple-barrel shotgun? Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: A kaleidoscope. |
 | Season 4 / Episode 3: - Reunion Ronon Dex: [after Sheppard sits down at his table and begins to eat] Teyla's already spoken to you, hasn't she. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Yeah, well, we had a little chat. Ronon Dex: Hm. So let's hear it. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Hear what? Ronon Dex: Whatever you've got to say. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Not gonna say anything. Ronon Dex: Really. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: I don't have to because you already know what I'm gonna tell ya. You're a valuable member of my team and that it would be difficult to find somebody to take your place. Ronon Dex: Mm hm. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: And that you may think you're going back to find something you've lost, but there's nothing to go back to. Sateda's gone, and running around with your buddies isn't gonna bring that back. Ronon Dex: [straight face] You're not gonna say any of that. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [shakes head, mouth full] Oh, I don't have to. Ronon Dex: Look, this isn't about me trying to bring back the past. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [getting increasingly angrier as the conversation progresses] Well then what is it? Ronon Dex: They need me. They always have. I'm the one that took care of them, got them home alive whenever we went into battle. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [staring at Ronan] You're one man, Ronan. You can't expect to protect them forever. Ronon Dex: Probably not. But that's where you guys come in. Ronon Dex: We got some intel on a Wraith target. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [pauses, shifting position] The Wraith and the Replicators are kinda beatin' the crap out of each other right now; I think it's counterproductive to run an op against them. Ronon Dex: I have a feeling you'll change your mind once you hear the details. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: [small nod, picks up coffee] Let's hear it. Ronon Dex: Not yet. I want Tyre, Ara, and Rackai in on this. |
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