Southland Quotes

Southland

- Episode Quotes

Fun Facts:

	Season 1 / Episode 7: - Derailed Shouting Woman: Every day, for fifteen years! Ofcr. John Cooper: Ma'am, what's the problem? Shouting Woman: They're out of chicken nuggets! I've eaten them every day for fifteen years! Ofcr. John Cooper: And you called 911 because they're out of chicken nuggets? Shouting Woman: What am I supposed to do? Ofcr. John Cooper: I don't know what you're supposed to do, but right now you need to bring it down! Shouting Woman: No, I won't! Ofcr. John Cooper: Yes, you will! Ofcr. Ben Sherman: Ma'am - have you tried the fish sandwich? Shouting Woman: [irritated] What? Ofcr. Ben Sherman: The fish... it's pretty good.
	Season 1 / Episode 7: - Derailed Man in Street: My car broke down. I'm-I-I-I gotta be someplace; I'm late. Ofcr. John Cooper: Whoa, whoa, stay - step away from the car, sir. Man in Street: [returning to the front passenger window] I just told you - I have an appointment, I need a ride, right now! Ofcr. John Cooper: We're not a taxi service, sir. Man in Street: Fine; call me a cab. Ofcr. John Cooper: You're a cab! Man in Street: [stunned]... What is wrong with you guys, man? - - you guys, bitches! - - you!
	Season 1 / Episode 7: - Derailed Det. Daniel Salinger: Hey - can you help me grill later? Kimmy Salinger: [trying to ignore him as she sunbathes] No. Det. Daniel Salinger: You know, there was a time when you used to love workin' side by side by the ol' grillmaster. Kimmy Salinger: Stop embarrassing yourself. Det. Daniel Salinger: Attendance is mandatory, Kimmy. Kimmy Salinger: Forget it; I made plans two weeks ago. Det. Daniel Salinger: Absolutely not. Family tradition; the whole block's comin'. Do you even know what this holiday's about? Huh? We honor those who gave up their lives defending our country. Kimmy Salinger: Like I give a - - . Mom! Liz Salinger: Sal - she made plans. Det. Daniel Salinger: Well, so... break 'em. Kimmy Salinger: [storming past him into the house] I hate you. Det. Daniel Salinger: Nice. Det. Daniel Salinger: D'ya hear that? Do you - I'm goin' over there. Where's the freakin' respect? It's Memorial Day, for cryin' out loud.
	Season 1 / Episode 7: - Derailed Det. Nate Moretta: [discussing the just-released Marta Ruiz] Well, what about ICE? She's freakin' illegal. Det. Sammy Bryant: Asylum. The lawyer told the court that if they deported her back to Mexico again, cartel would kill her. Det. Andy Williams: This is so screwed up; bring us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses dying to deal drugs. Det. Kenny 'No-Gun': The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Det. Sammy Bryant: Yeah, you think this is funny? Huh? She and her freakin' sons have tried to take out Janila twice. Now she's gotta wait for trial again, while this monster's out on bail?... This sucks!
	Season 1 / Episode 7: - Derailed Det. Kenny 'No-Gun': [observing a tattoo on a dead gang member] Jesús Malverde... the narco saint... you know, from Sinaloa? Patron saint for drug dealers. Det. Andy Williams: Looks like a bad actor in one of those cheesy Mexican films.
	Season 1 / Episode 7: - Derailed Marquis: [displaying the tattoo on his stomach] 'Trust No Bitch'. Marta Ruiz: I'm a bitch; and you trust me... you better find that girl and make sure she stays there. No more games. Marquis: I can do dat; she already text me - they're movin' her. Just give me a little time, let me settle in, and I'll let you know when you got your window. Marta Ruiz: You f- - up again, your whole family's in trouble. Everybody goes.
	Season 1 / Episode 6: - Westside Det. Lydia Adams: So we can get overtime to work homicide cases, but now suddenly there's money to fund Bel-Air break-ins. Det. Alicia Fernandez: The residents here don't feel safe. Det. Lydia Adams: And the residents in South Central don't either. Det. Alicia Fernandez: But these residents don't just bitch; they invite the chief of police over for cocktails. Det. Lydia Adams: [after Fernandez has walked away] How convenient, to have money.
	Season 1 / Episode 6: - Westside Young Man in Bar: You wanna get high? Ofcr. John Cooper: [annoyed] No; I don't wanna get high. Young Man in Bar: You just bought somethin'. Ofcr. John Cooper: So you think I'd risk a ninety thousand dollar a year job, my pension, and my belief system for you? Ofcr. John Cooper: Now get away from me, before I bring a whole barrel of ass whoopin' down on your head.
	Season 1 / Episode 6: - Westside Det. Sammy Bryant: Are you in front of a window? Tammi Bryant: Yeah; I am next to an enormous, beautiful window. Yes. Det. Sammy Bryant: What do you see? Do you see a school, a supermarket? Do you see a newsstand? No, you do not. You see homeless people, junkies, and concrete. Tammi Bryant: I hate where we live. It's killing me creatively. Det. Sammy Bryant: [he laughs derisively] Creatively!
	Season 1 / Episode 6: - Westside Det. Russell Clarke: [looking into a jewelry case] 'Scuse me - how much does somethin' like this go for? Lana Schmidt: Thirty thousand - that's art deco platinum, diamonds and sapphires; you shopping for someone in particular? Det. Russell Clarke: [deflated by the price] No, just curious. Det. Lydia Adams: So how many employees do you have? Lana Schmidt: Uh, mostly it's just me. I have two sales associates and a setter. Det. Russell Clarke: Do they have access to your customer database? Lana Schmidt: Honey, it's the information age; everyone has access to everything.
	Season 1 / Episode 6: - Westside Det. Russell Clarke: You wanna do in vitro again? You know, we're payin' off the last one. Dina Clarke: So, you wanna just give up? Det. Russell Clarke: No, we tried it, Dina - over and over again. Dina Clarke: So what are you gonna do - trade me in for someone with fresher eggs? Dina Clarke: I'm not a fool, Russell. You're in love with her, aren't you? Det. Russell Clarke: Who? Dina Clarke: That teacher. Det. Russell Clarke: You just got it all figured out, huh? Dina Clarke: Admit it. Det. Russell Clarke: Why? So that you can post it on your blog? Dina Clarke: [offended] You need to leave, Russell. Det. Russell Clarke: What? Dina Clarke: Leave. Please, just leave.
	Season 1 / Episode 6: - Westside Det. Lydia Adams: What's goin' on? Talib: Lydia, I don't... I don't think this is gonna work. Hey, look, I've been wrestlin' with this. You know, even goin' to see my pastor, and... I tried, I just can't get past the fact that, you know, that you lied. You know, that you lied about bein' a cop. Det. Lydia Adams: Are you serious? Talib: Yeah, I mean... I mean, how can you start a relationship... based on a lie? Det. Lydia Adams: Well, you knew that before we slept together. Did you tell your pastor that?
	Season 1 / Episode 5: - Two Gangs Kid with Sign: It's not illegal; my dad's a lawyer. Ofcr. John Cooper: Why you doin' this? Kid with Sign: It's for the money, man. Ofcr. John Cooper: The money? Ofcr. John Cooper: [both officers laugh] There's not even any radar up there! Kid with Sign: They don't know that. Ofcr. John Cooper: [laughing as Sherman hands the kid a dollar] Man... that's classic.
	Season 1 / Episode 5: - Two Gangs Ofcr. John Cooper: Ma'am? Is everything OK? Mother: [to her small daughter] Seeee? You dialed 911 and these nice men came to help us. That's how it works; if you ever have a problem or anything bad happens to you or mommy, you just dial 911. Ofcr. John Cooper: So let me get this straight: you just dialed 911 so you could teach your daughter how to use ut? Mother: Of course; how else is she going to learn? Ofcr. John Cooper: Well, no offense, ma'am... but you have your head up your friggin' ass.
	Season 1 / Episode 5: - Two Gangs Det. Sammy Bryant: [referring to Nate's wife] You a cop when you met her? Det. Nate Moretta: Nah, I was a private. Det. Sammy Bryant: ...I was a stoner when I met Tammi. Det. Nate Moretta: [laughing] What, are you serious? Det. Sammy Bryant: Stoned all through high school. Det. Nate Moretta: Wow. Det. Sammy Bryant: Just hangin' with my... Det. Nate Moretta: Was Tammi part of that group? Det. Sammy Bryant: My wife is not a group person; she doesn't get the team mentality. Det. Nate Moretta: ...It's her loss. Det. Sammy Bryant: [after a few seconds] You ever smoked weed? Det. Nate Moretta: ...No. Det. Sammy Bryant: [after considering this for several seconds]... Yeah, I didn't think so.
	Season 1 / Episode 5: - Two Gangs Det. Daniel Salinger: House right there? Kenny No-Gun: Yeah? Det. Daniel Salinger: Belongs to Miss Sally Hightower - 90 years young, outlived all her relatives. Told me the secret to a long life was prayer and a good rocking chair. Kenny No-Gun: Problem? Det. Daniel Salinger: [noting the empty porch] Yeah; she's almost always in it.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Kenny No-Gun: You know, from the rope we'll be able to tell what the guy's into; if it's nylon, it's boating, if it's polyester - shipping, polypropylene - fishing... you know, some rope is sensitive to the cold and other deteriorates in the UV light, so... Kenny No-Gun: ...From the sex crime days. Det. Andy Williams: I take back all the crap I said about you. Kenny No-Gun: Thank you.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Det. Lydia Adams: Well, what do you want me to do? Put on a little outfit, go out, get drunk, stagger to my car, get raped, and end up here for ten years, waitin' for somebody to do somethin' about it? Det. Russell Clarke: Jeez, Lyd - take it easy.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Cathleen Kerik: What kind of case were you pulled off of? Det. Lydia Adams: Girl in South Central, strangled and dumped in an alley. Nothin' you'd be concerned with. Cathleen Kerik: OK. What is it, exactly, that you don't like about me? Huh? Det. Lydia Adams: I don't like the fact that if this girl was found in an alley in Brentwood, this would be front page news. Cathleen Kerik: That... Det. Lydia Adams: I don't like that there's a backlog of rape DNA of three thousand cases. I don't like the skirt you wear, I don't like your hairstyle, I don't like that every time a man is within fifteen feet of you, you push out your chest and your voice gets all kittenish.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Corbin Nelson: ...Is my mom dead? Det. Russell Clarke: [reaching to turn off the TV] You mind if I turn this off here?... Yeah... she is... I'm really, really sorry. Corbin Nelson: ...She was a whore. Det. Russell Clarke: [taken aback by the blunt remark] She was your mom... Look - I know you're always gonna remember this night, how awful it is, but... you can build good memories, too... Y'know, you gotta do that, you gotta focus on that. Try and remember the nice things about her.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Dina Clarke: So what are you doin'? Typin' a letter or somethin'? Det. Russell Clarke: No, I'm gonna write. Dina Clarke: You are so competitive. Det. Russell Clarke: Can we not do this right now? Dina Clarke: But seriously, I write, so now you have to write? Det. Russell Clarke: Can't we just both write? Dina Clarke: You and every other cop - everyone thinks they're a writer. Det. Russell Clarke: You know what, Dina? You're not exactly Dostoyevsky, all right? Dina Clarke: ...You're screwing that teacher, aren't you? Det. Russell Clarke: [bewildered by the question]... No.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Det. Sammy Bryant: You've been draggin' my ass all over the place for two days - what the hell is goin' on, Nate? Det. Nate Moretta: Mercedes isn't my sister... she's my daughter. Det. Nate Moretta: Right after I enlisted, I found out my girlfriend was pregnant. We were all set to put the kid up for adoption, but my parents jumped in the middle of things. They refused to let their first grandchild be raised by a stranger. Det. Sammy Bryant: Does Mercedes know? Det. Nate Moretta: No... I don't know, maybe. Maybe that's why she's actin' out like this.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Det. Nate Moretta: I didn't want you to find out this way. Mercedes Moretta: When? On your deathbed? Det. Nate Moretta: ...Look, I was young. I couldn't give you the home that you deserved. Mom and Pops, they could give that to you. Mercedes Moretta: What about my mother? Why didn't she take me? Det. Nate Moretta: Because your mother... fell in with the wrong group of people. OK? She got into drugs, she got into alcohol. Mercedes Moretta: Do you still talk to her? Det. Nate Moretta: No, Mia, I don't. By the time I came home from the army, she... she moved away. Mercedes Moretta: Do I look like her? Det. Nate Moretta: Sure do - a lot. You're beautiful - just the way she was. Mercedes Moretta: I want to find her. Det. Nate Moretta: ...OK. We can try. Mercedes Moretta: For real? Det. Nate Moretta: For real.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Det. Russell Clarke: I think that, uh... she would have wanted you to have that. Corbin Nelson: My grandma said you caught the guy. Det. Russell Clarke: Yeah, we did. Corbin Nelson: That's good, right? Det. Russell Clarke: Definitely.
	Season 1 / Episode 4: - Sally in the Alley Det. Lydia Adams: I have something to tell you. I'm a cop. Talib: Jeez... Well, I didn't see that one comin'... Cop. So you - you enjoy your job? Det. Lydia Adams: I love it. Det. Lydia Adams: [it suddenly strikes her how true that statement is] Hm - I really love it... and I had a good week.
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - See a Woman Dr. Merrill Matthews: It says here that this is your last session. Dr. Merrill Matthews: How do you feel about the shooting? Ofcr. Ben Sherman: ...I'm okay with it... I didn't... enjoy it; it was unavoidable. Some guys, they work twenty years, they never have to shoot anybody... It's - it's weird, how much it means to guys like that... I'm okay with it. Dr. Merrill Matthews: Good... good.
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - See a Woman Ofcr. John Cooper: Bein' from Beverly Hills and all, you must have been in lots of therapy. Ofcr. Ben Sherman: Yeah, it's definitely not my first time at the rodeo.
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - See a Woman Ofcr. John Cooper: [watching Sherman text messaging] You like that thing? Text all your little buddies? I don't get it... I want less ways for people to reach me, not more.
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - See a Woman Ofcr. John Cooper: Sir - your car was stolen? Dante Johnson: Yeah - Azure got jacked; playoffs comin' up, dude - I can't be in that kind o' trouble. Ofcr. John Cooper: Could you be more specific? Dante Johnson: Went out last night, hit some places... came home, some people came to chill. Bentley Azure got jacked. Ofcr. John Cooper: So you wanna file a police report for a stolen vehicle? Dante Johnson: You ever go for some... strange? Ofcr. John Cooper: 'Scuse me? Dante Johnson: [leading Cooper and Sherman into his ornate dining room] Aiight, aiight - c'mere... c'mere - I'm married, aiight? My wife is in St. Bart's with Dante Jr. - she has this dog, a Great Dane. I don't give a - - about the car; insurance'll cover it - but you gotta get me the dog back. Now, she comes home tomorrow; gotta get me the dog. I got some pictures of it somewhere around here. Ofcr. John Cooper: Sir - do you or do you not want to file a police report? Dante Johnson: I'm married, motherf- - ; I can't be filin' no report! Ofcr. John Cooper: ...So women took the car. Dante Johnson: Yeah, women took the car. Ofcr. John Cooper: And you don't wanna file a report. Dante Johnson: You ain't listenin', bra! Protect and serve, motherf- - ! You got somethin' against me? I got rights. Ofcr. John Cooper: Sir... you have to file a police report; we're not private detectives. Dante Johnson: Aiight... aiight, aiight - I got a better idea. I go with you - we go lookin' around. I got some ideas where the bitches be at. Wait here - lemme change, aiight? Ten, fifteen minutes.
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - See a Woman Responding Officer: So I guess this is suspicious death, right? Ofcr. John Cooper: No... no, it's not a "suspicious death"; this isn't a friggin' Agatha Christie novel! There's accidental death, there's suicide, and then there's homicide - this is homicide. He's goin' in for murder.

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