Peaches: I am the Dark Underlord, the Prince of Doom, the King of Eternal Torment! I am Pain! I am Evil! They call me... Peaches!
Peaches: This is a 1954 McSpirit Spectervision 3000, and it belongs to me! Do you know what that makes it?
Heffer: Um... I give up.
Peaches: It's the TV from Heck!
Heffer: Wait a minute. Heck? Isn't it supposed to be...
Peaches: [Covers Heffer's mouth] Censors! And here's the lamp from Heck, and the pineapple from Heck...
Heffer: I love it when people say that.
Heffer: Can you pass the remote?
Peaches: You poor fool. Still don't realize where you are? There is no remote!
Heffer: Hey, Rocko. Which is funnier, bananas or cheese?
Rocko: Cheese, Hef. Definitely cheese.
Filburt: Heffer, would you like to say a few words?
Heffer: Uh... Beans, beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat...
Filburt: All right, that's enough of that.
Rocko: I'm not a dog, I'm a wallaby!
Dog Catcher: A wallaby?
Rocko: Yeah. It's like a kangaroo, only smaller.
Dog Catcher: You made that up!
Heffer: You know, I died once.
Filburt: [Reading the Fortune Cookie] Bad luck and extreme misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for all eternity.