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Fun Facts:» Trivia» Quotes » Goofs |
 | Season 1 / Episode 21: - Chest Pains Brenda Morgenstern: Vince, this is so much trouble you go to. I mean, why lug your accordian all the way here when I can just put on some records or something? Vince Mazuma: Well, I thought it would turn you on. |
| Season 1 / Episode 21: - Chest Pains Dr. Henry Gerber: How old are you? Ida Morgenstern: Guess. Dr. Henry Gerber: Do you know how many patients I have waiting for me out there? Ida Morgenstern: I'll guess that when you guess my age. Dr. Henry Gerber: 50. Ida Morgenstern: 7. Dr. Henry Gerber: You're 57-years-old? Ida Morgenstern: No. I thought you had 7 patients waiting out there. Ida Morgenstern: I'm 52. Dr. Henry Gerber: Thank you. |
| Season 1 / Episode 21: - Chest Pains Dr. Henry Gerber: Have you had any social diseases? Ida Morgenstern: Social diseases? I don't know who brought you up, but I'm a lady, and you're not to use words like that in my presence. |
| Season 1 / Episode 21: - Chest Pains Dr. Henry Gerber: Do you have any allergies? Ida Morgenstern: I'm allergic to little bottles. Dr. Henry Gerber: Then I'll get you a big one. |
| Season 1 / Episode 21: - Chest Pains Dr. Henry Gerber: Should we go into the examination room? Ida Morgenstern: Alright, where's the woman who's going to examine me? Dr. Henry Gerber: I'm going to examine you. Ida Morgenstern: You? Why? Dr. Henry Gerber: Why? Why do you think? Ida Morgenstern: Because I think you get your kicks from seeing a woman my age naked. Dr. Henry Gerber: Mrs. Morgenstern, I examine naked people all day long. I've been doing it for over 20 years. Ida Morgenstern: Aw, come on doctor, you mean to say if uh, you don't see an extrordinary body, you don't let that stethoscope linger a little? |
| Season 1 / Episode 21: - Chest Pains Rhoda Morgenstern Gerard: Aw, listen, I didn't mean to interrupt... I mean busting in on you and, uh... Brenda Morgenstern: ...Vince. Vince Mazuma: Hey, don't worry about it. If anything was really going on, we wouldn't have heard the knock. |
| Season 1 / Episode 1: - Joe Rhoda Morgenstern Gerard: [During the first season opening credits] "My name is Rhoda Morgenstern. I was born in the Bronx, New York in December, 1941. I've always felt responsible for World War II. The first thing I remember liking that liked me back was food. I had a bad puberty; it lasted 17 years. I'm a high school graduate. I went to art school. My entrance exam was on a book of matches. I decided to move out of the house when I was 24; my mother still refers to this as the time I ran away from home. Eventually I ran to Minneapolis, where it's cold, and I figured I'd keep better. Now I'm back in Manhattan. New York, this is your last chance!" |
| Unknown Episode: Carlton: Hello, this is Carlton your doorman. |
| Unknown Episode: Carlton: Drinking doesn't cause hangovers; stopping drinking causes hangovers. |
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