Shawn Spencer

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James Roday
James Roday Rodr�guez was born on April 4, 1976. He is the son of Jim Rodr�guez, who worked for Boardwalk ...

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Shawn Spencer Quotes

	Season 4 / Episode 8: - Let's Get Hairy Stewart Gimbley: I went to the cops, and told them to put me in a cell, and the detective said jail is for criminals, not for delusional wackadoos. Shawn Spencer: He said "wackadoos"? Stewart Gimbley: Uh huh. And then he pinched himself, and told me to go see you guys. Burton Guster: What did this detective look like? Stewart Gimbley: Imagine Robert Goulet dressed liked Mr. Bean playing the Scarecrow in a Summer Stock production of the Wizard of Oz dedicated to Tony Randall.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [to Abigail] This is Detective Carlton Lassiter. I do his job and sometimes his hair, though clearly not today.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [to Abigail] This is Detective Carlton Lassiter. I do his job and sometimes his hair, though clearly not today.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [to Abigail, on the police station] This place was actually built by the Amish, which explains the complete and utter lack of zippers.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [to Abigail, on the police station] This place was actually built by the Amish, which explains the complete and utter lack of zippers.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: What can I do for you...? Raj: Raj. Shawn Spencer: Can I call you Roger? Raj: First name's Rajesh. Shawn Spencer: Let's stick with Roger.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: What can I do for you...? Raj: Raj. Shawn Spencer: Can I call you Roger? Raj: First name's Rajesh. Shawn Spencer: Let's stick with Roger.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [to Raj] I'm going to tell you what I do. I don't want you to freak out because it's so cool, okay? I'm a psychic. A great and powerful psychic, whose powers inspire fear and awe in those who first experience them. I am a crime solving machine and I have closed over fifty cases - many without pants.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [to Raj] I'm going to tell you what I do. I don't want you to freak out because it's so cool, okay? I'm a psychic. A great and powerful psychic, whose powers inspire fear and awe in those who first experience them. I am a crime solving machine and I have closed over fifty cases - many without pants.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: Look, I was humiliated by Lassiter. Carlton Lassiter. A challenge has been issued and I need every tool we've got. Burton Guster: Are you calling me a tool? Shawn Spencer: I'm calling you my partner, my logic braid, my magic wish machine.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: Look, I was humiliated by Lassiter. Carlton Lassiter. A challenge has been issued and I need every tool we've got. Burton Guster: Are you calling me a tool? Shawn Spencer: I'm calling you my partner, my logic braid, my magic wish machine.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Carlton Lassiter: At this point it looks like an accident. Shawn Spencer: Like your hair. Carlton Lassiter: Really? Down to hair jokes, now?
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Carlton Lassiter: At this point it looks like an accident. Shawn Spencer: Like your hair. Carlton Lassiter: Really? Down to hair jokes, now?
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Juliet O'Hara: [Shawn emerges on the ladder next to her] Um, Shawn, you know this ladder is really built for one. Shawn Spencer: Well, Jules, lots of things say they're built for one but can easily fit two people. Tanning beds, iron lung, that's just to name two.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Juliet O'Hara: [Shawn emerges on the ladder next to her] Um, Shawn, you know this ladder is really built for one. Shawn Spencer: Well, Jules, lots of things say they're built for one but can easily fit two people. Tanning beds, iron lung, that's just to name two.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [to Raj] As sure as I am that Gus will cause his own death, I know you are not cursed.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [to Raj] As sure as I am that Gus will cause his own death, I know you are not cursed.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Raj: You know, guys, my grandmother tends to make her food a little spicy. You might want to take it easy. Burton Guster: [laughs] Please! I'm one quarter Jamaican. Shawn Spencer: I'm also one quarter Jamaican. Burton Guster: You are not. Stop telling people that.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Raj: You know, guys, my grandmother tends to make her food a little spicy. You might want to take it easy. Burton Guster: [laughs] Please! I'm one quarter Jamaican. Shawn Spencer: I'm also one quarter Jamaican. Burton Guster: You are not. Stop telling people that.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [to Raj's grandmother] I'm sorry, was this chicken seasoned with molten lava?
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [to Raj's grandmother] I'm sorry, was this chicken seasoned with molten lava?
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [re: the spicy food] Really, you're just fine? Abigail Lytar: I taught English to children in Mumbai for a month. This is very authentic. What's the matter, Shawn, you don't like it? Shawn Spencer: No, no, I think I like it too much. It's so authentic. [Crying slightly from the spice. To Gus] Dude, I can't see anything out of my left eye. Burton Guster: I see dead people. Shawn Spencer: [Both drink some water] My god, even the water's spicy. Burton Guster: Who does that?
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [re: the spicy food] Really, you're just fine? Abigail Lytar: I taught English to children in Mumbai for a month. This is very authentic. What's the matter, Shawn, you don't like it? Shawn Spencer: No, no, I think I like it too much. It's so authentic. [Crying slightly from the spice. To Gus] Dude, I can't see anything out of my left eye. Burton Guster: I see dead people. Shawn Spencer: [Both drink some water] My god, even the water's spicy. Burton Guster: Who does that?
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Abigail Lytar: So you came here to help Raj. Shawn Spencer: Yes. Abigail Lytar: And instead you got his brother arrested. Shawn Spencer: That's correct. Abigail Lytar: Business as usual? Shawn Spencer: It's a process.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Abigail Lytar: So you came here to help Raj. Shawn Spencer: Yes. Abigail Lytar: And instead you got his brother arrested. Shawn Spencer: That's correct. Abigail Lytar: Business as usual? Shawn Spencer: It's a process.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Burton Guster: [Re: Raj] Are you as jealous of this guy as I am? Shawn Spencer: More. Except for the part where his girlfriends almost die.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Burton Guster: [Re: Raj] Are you as jealous of this guy as I am? Shawn Spencer: More. Except for the part where his girlfriends almost die.
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [to Raj] We've spoke to your other girlfriends. Burton Guster: And we've concluded that they were all kind of hot. [Raj smiles]
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Bollywood Homicide Shawn Spencer: [to Raj] We've spoke to your other girlfriends. Burton Guster: And we've concluded that they were all kind of hot. [Raj smiles]
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - TBA Shawn Spencer: [in a car, doing surveillance on Juliet and Raj on a fake date] Man, I don't like this. Burton Guster: You don't like Juliet dating somebody. Shawn Spencer: Fake dating. That's not it. It's this whole using-her-as-bait thing. Burton Guster: You had no problem dangling his girlfriend out there as bait. Shawn Spencer: Now you're changing the rules, aren't you? Look at Raj. He's getting awfully hands-y over there. Taking advantage of the situation like that! Carlton Lassiter: [over the walkie talkie] No, he's definitely bugged by O'Hara dating this guy. Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't leave the talk button on.

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