Numb3rs Quotes

Numb3rs

- Episode Quotes

Fun Facts:

	Season 6 / Episode 6: - Dreamland Charlie Eppes: Looks like diagnostic equpiment. Serious computing power. Colby Granger: So what do you think, more UFO hunters? Charlie Eppes: No, no, no. This is - this is, like, special equipment. It's very sophisticated and expensive. Colby Granger: Designed to do what? Charlie Eppes: I don't know. Something complex. [pause] Hey, this is - this is some sort of viscous material here. Colby Granger: Charlie, yeah, actually, I think that's part of a guy.
	Season 6 / Episode 6: - Dreamland Amita Ramanujan: [Wondering if the victims were killed by a directed energy weapon] Makes more sense than ETs or ghosts. Floyd Mayborne: The Pentagon has no contract with aliens or with afterlife entities. [pause] That I'm aware of. [pause] At this time.
	Season 6 / Episode 5: - TBA Russell Lazlo: [about the cake problem] What's the matter with you mathematicians? Cake is never a problem.
	Season 5 / Episode 21: - Disturbed Charlie Eppes: Some people drink, some gamble - I analyze data.
	Season 5 / Episode 15: - Guilt Trip Colby Granger: I seem like a roast beef kind of guy to you? David Sinclair: I won't discuss another man's meat.
	Season 5 / Episode 10: - Frienemies Colby Granger: [Colby and David walk into a neighborhood being run by a criminal and everyone promptly goes into their homes] Everybody knows our name, but nobody's glad we came.
	Season 5 / Episode 10: - Frienemies Charlie Eppes: Why do I let Marshall get to me? Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: He's a rival. Look, everybody has one, and frankly who they are says a lot about who you are. Charlie Eppes: Yeah, what does Marshall hating me say about me? Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: He doesn't hate you. What is the word Amita uses? Charlie Eppes: Frienemy. Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: There you go. Colleagues as well as rivals. I think you just remind each other of a time in your careers when you were both less secure in your reputations. Charlie Eppes: What about you? Who sets you off? Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Alan McNabb. Guy in my car club. He absolutely covets my Ford Roadster, yet he always says the leather is not restored to 1931 period standard, the color is all wrong, he is just one jealous bastard!
	Season 5 / Episode 10: - Frienemies Charlie Eppes: It sounds like they created a classic game theory scenario doesn't it? Marshall Penfield: [Smiles] Yes it does, 'Johnny von Neumann', the old three man gunfight. Colby Granger: A mathematical gunfight huh? Marshall Penfield: Imagine a duel between three people. Now I'm the worst shot. I hit the target once every three tries. Marshall Penfield: One of my opponents is better. Hits it twice every three shots. Marshall Penfield: The third guy is a dead shot. He never misses. Now each gets one shot. As the worst, I go first. Then Charlie, then Colby. Who do I aim for, for my one shot? Colby Granger: I guess me cause I'm the biggest danger right? Marshall Penfield: [Makes a gun shooting motion toward Charlie] I shoot Eppsey first, but not for the obvious reasons. Chances are two to one I'm going to miss. Charlie Eppes: And now it's my turn. Logic says I shoot Colby. Colby Granger: Right, cause if I'm still standing I'm gonna shoot you and I don't miss. Charlie Eppes: Exactly. Marshall Penfield: As the worst, I use the two better shooters against each other
	Season 5 / Episode 8: - Thirty Six Hours Tim Hamer: [Frantically trying to summon help as the cargo train he and Cutty are driving is about to crash] Desert Pacific Rail, do you read me? Over! Cutty Nagim: We're not gonna make it! [Slams on the emergency brake; it does not work] I can't get it stopped! Tim Hamer: Dispatch! This is Desert Pacific Rail! Dispatch, do you read me? Cutty Nagim: Jump, Tim! Tim Hamer: [Makes one last attempt] DISPATCH! Cutty Nagim: TIM, JUMP! [Tim jumps off the moving train, while Cutty stays behind the wheel as it crashes]
	Season 5 / Episode 8: - Thirty Six Hours Roman Markovius: I just bought a sizable stake in rail transport. It's my business now, why would I harm it? Don Eppes: Well, one reason is you'd bring prices down. You could snatch up inventory. Roman Markovius: You think like a criminal. Don Eppes: That's how I catch them
	Season 5 / Episode 2: - Decoy Effect Alan Eppes: Listen, Charlie, when you're dealing with the Government... it doesn't hurt to have more than just the facts on your side.
	Season 4 / Episode 14: - Checkmate Driving Instructor: Okay, here's the scenario. You just witnessed an armed robbery, multiple shots fired. Ready, go. Charlie Eppes: [checking seatbelt, adjusting mirror] Um, let me just make sure, um... okay, okay... Driving Instructor: What are you doing, Eppes? This isn't driver's ed. You're in pursuit! Charlie Eppes: [floors the accelerator] Okay. Driving Instructor: Your siren, Agent Eppes. You forgot your siren. Charlie Eppes: So, that's right, uh... where is that? [turns on siren] Driving Instructor: [Charlie drives erratically, crashing into orange cones and other items] You just killed a mailbox. Keep your eyes on the road. Radio. You need to call in your pursuit. Charlie Eppes: [into radio] Good morning. This is Charles Eppes. I'm in pursuit of a burgundy-ish, sort of, merlot colored. [to driving instructor] What kind of car would you say that is? Driving Instructor: It's a Ford. Charlie Eppes: Really doesn't look like a Ford. [into radio] Anyway, a Ford. Driving Instructor: Look out! Megan Reeves: [Opening door of car] Hey, Speed Racer! [to instructor] Can I borrow him for a minute. Driving Instructor: Take the afternoon.
	Season 4 / Episode 13: - Black Swan Colby Granger: [David asks Colby to climb up the trellis] Yeah. Colby, go down the elevator shaft. Colby, jump in the bay. Hey, Colby, climb the Sixth Street Bridge. David Sinclair: I went out on the bridge with you, okay?
	Season 4 / Episode 9: - Graphic Don Eppes: [Ross is drawing Charlie and Don in a back-to-back action-hero pose] You think someone actually might publish this? Ross Moore: An FBI agent who solves crimes with the help of his mathematician brother? It's great! Don Eppes: Aw, nobody would believe it.
	Season 4 / Episode 9: - Graphic Charlie Eppes: [discussing Comic Books] Galactus? That's the guy who ate planets! Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Yeah, but he was stellar Darwinism. He was necessary to the survival of the universe. Charlie Eppes: What? Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: He was the third four, along with eternity and death. Charlie Eppes: Larry, he wanted to eat the earth. Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: But he didn't!
	Season 4 / Episode 9: - Graphic Charlie Eppes: [reading the proof for Vanity Fair] His brother Don, a special agent in the Los Angelies office of the FBI believes Charles Epps has recently conquered the greatest challenge of friendship. 'Charlie and I has our issues growing up... ' Don Eppes: Yeh, to say the least. Charlie Eppes: '... but if there is anything stronger than the bond between brothers its the bond between brothers who have become friends. Charlie's my friend'.
	Season 4 / Episode 5: - Robin Hood Det. Gary Walker: [Don and Walker are driving down an alley after a suspect] Hey Eppes, you ever play Polo? Don Eppes: All right, here we go! Giddyap! Don Eppes: [Walker opens the car door so it slams against the bad guy as they drive past, they get out to cuff him] Well, that's your sport, Gary! The boy's out cold!
	Season 4 / Episode 5: - Robin Hood Det. Gary Walker: That's what I like about the new generation, they got an answer for everything. Don Eppes: I don't have an answer for dating a co-worker though. Det. Gary Walker: [looks through break room window at Megan, David, and Colby] Reeves? You and Reeves? Don Eppes: No no no, you didn't know I was dating Liz Warner? Det. Gary Walker: [raises eyebrows] Ooh ho ho!
	Season 4 / Episode 5: - Robin Hood David Sinclair: [David and Colby had been chewed out by Don for screwing up earlier, now talking to the son of another suspect] Well how about you tell him to come outside anyway? David Sinclair: [Colby helps David throw the guy onto the car, brings around his arm to cuff him] Who says we're out of sync?
	Season 4 / Episode 5: - Robin Hood Alan Eppes: [a pumpkin falls in the background and shatters on the ground like glass, startling Alan] What the hell was that? Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: A Cal Sci Tradition. Every Halloween the students drop pumpkins from the highest point on campus. Alan Eppes: From the roof of the library? [Another pumpkins shatters] Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Yeah, the tradition further holds that the pumpkins be dipped in liquid nitrogen to intensify the explosion. Alan Eppes: Well in that case, I'm starting a new tradition: The frightened student dash. [Runs down the stairs as another pumpkin drops]
	Season 4 / Episode 5: - Robin Hood Charlie Eppes: [Charlie walks in to his office to find his dad and Larry pulling pumpkins out of a liquid nitrogen bath] Oh no, please don't tell me you're encouraging this. Alan Eppes: Now, don't blame Larry. This was my idea. Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Yeah, your father though it would help him connect to the younger students. Charlie Eppes: Well then, what's your excuse? Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: I just like watching things explode.
	Season 4 / Episode 5: - Robin Hood Amita Ramanujan: [Amita almost bumps into Larry headed out with a frozen pumpkin] Whoa. What's all that about? Charlie Eppes: The two great adult influences in my life are heading off to blow up pumpkins.
	Season 3 / Episode 23: - Money For Nothing Charlie Eppes: I'm not as helpless as people think I am.
	Season 3 / Episode 13: - Finders Keepers Charlie Eppes: Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Colby Granger: Uhhh... no.
	Season 3 / Episode 12: - Nine Wives Alan Eppes: We? Charlie Eppes: Amita and I. We're driving down together. Alan Eppes: Oh. A romantic weekend away together. Charlie Eppes: Well, we will be driving through wine country.
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - Waste Not Megan Reeves: Hi handsome! Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Hey, what are you doing here? Oh I'm sorry, is it wenesday already or i missed our lunch? Forgive me. Megan Reeves: It's monday! Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Oh, all right. Ok see you later. Megan Reeves: Hey, I just wanna have a conversation.
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Blackout Charlie Eppes: She dumped you? Don Eppes: Shutup!
	Season 3 / Episode 6: - Longshot Charlie Eppes: Why are you doing that right now? Larry Fleinhardt: Did you know that primitive societies believed in using percussion as a means of communicating with the dead? Charlie Eppes: Are you drumming for someone in particular? Larry Fleinhardt: Yes, I'm drumming for the corpse of my inspiration. Charlie Eppes: And banging bongos worked for Richard Feynman, so... Larry Fleinhardt: Feynman delighted in making music. I never percuss for pleasure.
	Season 3 / Episode 6: - Longshot Charlie Eppes: I'll be home later for dinner. Alan Eppes: OK... I'm goin' out for dinner.
	Season 3 / Episode 6: - Longshot Megan Reeves: So go over the schedule with me one more time? Larry Fleinhardt: Okay, dinner and a movie every other Friday, lunch on Thursdays, now Wednesdays? Megan Reeves: And I get a wildcard once a month. Larry Fleinhardt: That's is, to use at your own digression. Megan Reeves: And what do we call this? Larry Fleinhardt: Oh, how 'bout structured complexity? Megan Reeves: You know, I'm thinking of using my wildcard. Larry Fleinhardt: Oh yeah? Megan Reeves: Yeah. Maybe for breakfast tomorrow.

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