Melrose Place Quotes

Melrose Place

- Episode Quotes

Fun Facts:

	Season 7 / Episode 32: - Floral Knowledge Eve Cleary: 2, 4, 6, 8... Who can I annihilate...
	Season 6 / Episode 10: - My Little Coma Girl Joan Campbell: [to Samantha, at her wedding to Billy] You had better keep your eye on him. You weren't the first love of his life, and you won't be the last. Here's a toast, to my current daughter in law. May your marriage to Billy last longer than his first. Or, am I not allowed to mention Brooke either? Now don't you go wearing your high heels around the pool.
	Season 6 / Episode 4: - The Doctor Is In... Deep Dr. Michael Mancini: [meeting Lexi for the first time] Can I buy you a drink? Lexi Sterling: No, but you can take me up to your room and make love to me all night.
	Season 6 / Episode 1: - Brand New Day Priest: If there is anyone who has good reason why this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace. Dr. Peter Burns: Actually, I think I do. Taylor Davis McBride: Peter, that's not funny. Dr. Peter Burns: No, it's hilarious actually, if you think about it. Really, just think about it. Just probe that scheming little brain of yours and try to understand how you could think for a second that I could possibly stomach being in your presence for one more minute, much less marry you. Taylor Davis McBride: Peter. My God, stop it. Dr. Peter Burns: Did you think I was insane and stupid? I know what you and Michael did. I know about the lies. I know about the drugs. I know about the fake beatings, and how you had wanted to ruin me so you could come full circle with your bizarre fantasy of marrying your dead sister's husband. Taylor Davis McBride: I won't listen to this. Dr. Peter Burns: How could you believe that I would ever love you or want to touch you. You know what Taylor? Your a joke, and it's hard to believe that you were ever related to your sister, because to me, your lower than a slug. You ruined my marriage to Amanda and then you tried to destroy me, and now you want me to believe you're carrying my child? That's beyond pathetic. The thought of you being pregnant with my child is enough to make me vomit. Goodbye Taylor. I hope you get a ride back to wherever you came from.
	Season 6 / Episode 1: - Brand New Day Matt Fielding: [Matt's final words before leaving Melrose Place] I had never lived anywhere like this. It's a special place, you know? Amazing people have passed through here. Some have died, some have gotten married and just moved on... But I swear it was only a moment ago I was sitting at the edge of that pool laughing with Rhonda. I'll remember them all. The old and the new. And I will always remember this place. It's where I really grew up.
	Season 5 / Episode 28: - Deja Vu All Over Again Amanda Woodward: Just one piece of advice to you to make sure this interview wasn't a complete waste. That type of arrogant attitude will not get you anywhere in the advertising world. Jennifer Mancini: That didn't stop you. Did it?
	Season 5 / Episode 28: - Deja Vu All Over Again Jennifer Mancini: You know Michael, he likes to bend the truth. But you probably do too, being in advertising. Amanda Woodward: We walk a fine line. Jennifer Mancini: Right, truth with a little "t", as opposed to the actual Truth, which is with a big "T". Am I getting too philosophical? I don't want to lose you. Amanda Woodward: [getting annoyed] Well, considering your resume barely qualifies for entry level, I doubt it. So what kind of advertising do you like? Jennifer Mancini: I know what I don't like. That billboard on Whilshire with the busty bimbo showing the "Sunset Diet Plan." No normal woman's ever going to respond to a cheesy ad like that. Amanda Woodward: That was my ad campaign. Jennifer Mancini: [laughs] I'm so embarrassed... Amanda Woodward: Yeah. Jennifer Mancini: ...for you.
	Season 5 / Episode 27: - The Dead Wives Club Taylor McBride: [to Sydney] Not again. Not again with you! I knew when you lost your business, you'd come crawling back here looking for work. Kyle McBride: I take it you don't like the idea of Sydney working here as a waitress? Taylor McBride: Hate it. Kyle McBride: [to Sydney] You're hired, Syd. You can start tonight.
	Season 5 / Episode 26: - Last Exit to Ohio Dr. Michael Mancini: Kimberly, you're a doctor. You know the facts, and the fact is, your mother's solution to everything is to drag you back to the midwest, even if it risks your life, because she hates me. Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: Michael that's not so. Marion Shaw: You're right Michael. I would do anything to get her away from you. She was a doctor with a bright future until you nearly killed her. And then you infected her with your cruelty and your deceit. You made her sick... I'm gonna make her well. Dr. Michael Mancini: And I gave her cancer, right? You'd blame me for global warming if you could make it fly... you are a twisted, bitter old crone, you know that?
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Sole Sister Dr. Michael Mancini: Everything else has been so... Megan Lewis: Complicated? Dr. Michael Mancini: Yeah. Megan Lewis: Do you think it's still because your're in love with your wife? Dr. Michael Mancini: Ah... Kimberly's gone. She's in the past now. Megan Lewis: Maybe, but you still have feelings for her. Dr. Michael Mancini: Well, what I mean is that you go through all the things we went through and then, suddenly it's gone. Yeah, sure, I still got feelings, but they'll pass. It's just gonna take a little time, that's all. Megan Lewis: Michael, I need to know how you really feel. I mean, I want to belive it's just a question of time but I'm... you know. I'm afraid that no matter how long I wait, you're still going to be in love with Kimberly. I mean, weeks will go by, and months... and still, every time you hold me, you'll be holding her. I don't think I can stand that. I need you to love me. Dr. Michael Mancini: I do. I swear.
	Season 5 / Episode 11: - Sole Sister Sydney Andrews: What is wrong with you since you got back? If I can't talk to you, who else can I talk to? Jane Andrews Mancini: Pleas, don't do this to me right now. Sydney Andrews: Don't do this to you? What about me? Jane, no one else can understand me. I'm your sister for cryin' out loud. Jane Andrews Mancini: No, I'm not! I'm not your sister, Sydney. Sydney Andrews: What are you talking about? Jane Andrews Mancini: Mom and Dad kept it a secret all these years. I just found out last week. Sydney Andrews: What you mean, like I'm adopted or something? Jane Andrews Mancini: No "I'm" adopted. I found out when I was home. They adopted me, and years later, they had you. Never told either one of us. Sydney Andrews: What? Oh, my god, Jane... what is going on? Jane Andrews Mancini: I don't know. I'm lost. I feel like suddenly I don't have anything anymore.
	Season 5 / Episode 8: - Mission: Interpersonal Priest: [calling after Kimberly, as she is leaving a church after learning she has three months to live] Are you alright? Listen, if you need an ear... Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: [angrily] I need a second chance, that's what I need. Can you give me that, Father? Priest: Sometimes, yes. Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: Ok, try this on for size... [pause] I'm dying. A tumor, and there's nothing anyone can do about it. I don't know how to tell people, even my husband doesn't know. So I was driving by, saw your church, and I haven't been in one since I was a kid... listen to me, like you need to hear my rantings. Priest: Rantings? To me they sound like prayers. Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: [long pause] I'm scared.
	Season 5 / Episode 5: - Un-Janed Melody Craig Fields: I don't expect to be treated differently because I'm the boss's son... but I do take cream in my coffee.
	Season 5 / Episode 3: - Moving Violations Samantha Reilly: I don't understand, I mean, why would you stab a dead man with a broach? An antique broach. My grandmother's broach. A family heirloom. Jane Andrews Mancini: Richard could have been faking it again. Samantha Reilly: Again? What does that mean? You're either dead or you're alive. There's no in between... unless you're a Buddhist.
	Season 5 / Episode 1: - Living With Disaster Amanda Woodward: Well she could be on the moon for all I care, she's not getting her deposit back.
	Season 4 / Episode 32: - Full Metal Betsy Sydney Andrews: Pray with me Jane. Put your decision in the hands of a higher power. Jane Andrews Mancini: I am. Smith & Wesson.
	Season 4 / Episode 30: - Melrose Unglued Gun Club Manager: You seem kind of new at this. Jane Andrews Mancini: Yes, this is my first gun. Gun Club Manager: Oh, yeah? What'd you get it for? Self-defense? Jane Andrews Mancini: Safe sex.
	Season 4 / Episode 26: - The Burning Couch Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: You blew it, Betsy. And now it's my turn. Rita knows how to take care of her man.
	Season 4 / Episode 26: - The Burning Couch Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: Hey, you know what they say, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a good cigar.
	Season 4 / Episode 26: - The Burning Couch Dr. Peter Burns: Uh... Hi. How's it going, Kimberly? Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: [as Rita] Actually, it's Rita. It's cool. Everything's cool. Dr. Peter Burns: No more weird interludes? No more blackout spells? Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: I wasn't blacking out... I just wasn't myself. Dr. Peter Burns: You thought you were going crazy the last time we talked. You called yourself Betsy. Ordered Tupperware? Don't you remember? Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: That was just some role-playing therapy. Everthing's under control now. Dr. Peter Burns: Why am I not reassured? Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: Hey, come on. We all have different personalities inside us. You almost killed Amanda once. You'd probably kill for her right now.
	Season 4 / Episode 21: - No Lifeguard on Duty (2) Brooke Armstrong: Hello, Billy. Miss me? Nice job at my funeral. What happened? Couldn't you admit that it's your fault that I'm dead? Billy Campbell: This isn't happening. Brooke Armstrong: Oh, yes it is, and it is your fault. I came to you with so much love, and you gave me nothing but hate. Too bad Alison won't stay with you. I guess she knows that you're a heartless, unfeeling bastard! Brooke Armstrong: You can't run away from me. I'll never leave you. Billy Campbell: Stop it! Brooke Armstrong: I'll never leave you alone!
	Season 4 / Episode 21: - No Lifeguard on Duty (2) Billy Campbell: What do you want from me? Brooke Armstrong: I don't want anything from you. I don't need your love anymore. Do you know why? Because you sold me your soul. And all it cost me was one little line. That silly little Lindy Toy slogan, it's going to make you a star. And from now on, every step you take, every bridge you burn, will be because of me.
	Season 4 / Episode 20: - No Lifeguard on Duty (1) Brooke Armstrong Campbell: You know I've always wanted to say this to you, Amanda. Alison Parker Armstrong: Don't say anything that you will regret. Brooke Armstrong Campbell: Kiss my ass! Amanda Woodward: You're fired.
	Season 4 / Episode 20: - No Lifeguard on Duty (1) Brooke Armstrong Campbell: Nobody's home... Nobody cares...
	Season 4 / Episode 20: - No Lifeguard on Duty (1) Amanda Woodward: I don't know what you're up to, but Bobby's off-limits. Sydney Andrews: Feeling a little insecure Amanda? Amanda Woodward: [sarcastic] Ooops! No, just a little clumsy. Sydney Andrews: You totally did that on purpose! Amanda Woodward: [feigning innocence] I did no such thing. Sydney, you can put on an expensive dress, get your red hair done, clip on some earrings. Bottom line? You're still a two-dollar hooker... you just have a new pimp.
	Season 4 / Episode 16: - Holy Strokes Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: Is there something you'd like to tell me, Sydney? Sydney Andrews: I don't know what you mean. Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: You must know, Jane's condition is very serious. They've ordered toxicology tests, which means they suspect a possible drug overdose. Remember what we talked about in our sessions, Sydney... about purging oneself? Sydney Andrews: But... I'm not guilty of anything. Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: There's really no need to be frightened. I'm your doctor and your my patient, and anything you tell me will be kept in the strictest confidence. But if I'm kept in the dark, and I'm questioned by the authorities about the pills I prescribed to you and how... they might have somehow found their into Jane's drink, and... Sydney Andrews: [interrupting] All right! I did it. I put the pills in her drink. I just wanted to knock her out, that's all so that she'd be too passive, even for Michael. I never meant for this to happen. If anything happens to her, I'll never forgive myself. Oh God, Kimberly, what am I gonna do? Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: It's all right, Sydney. I'm here. You just leave everything to me.
	Season 4 / Episode 9: - Amanda Unplugged Amanda Woodward: Hi, Jack. It's me, Amanda. I was just thinking about our special times we had together. Like the time I forgot to fold your socks, and you pounded my face into the bedpost. I needed 18 stitches that time. Or remember when you broke my hand because I wore the wrong color dress to your birthday party? Remember how I cried all night? Well, remember this, Jack, for every bruise and black eye you gave me... you son of a bitch, I hope you die.
	Season 4 / Episode 7: - Let the Games Begin Billy Campbell: Don't do this. There are plenty of other accounts that Brooke can get. Amanda Woodward: If it wasn't Brooke, Jack would still find another way in. Billy Campbell: We're not in Miami anymore, so just tell the guy to take a hike. Amanda Woodward: I'm handling this, all right? Just stay out it and stay away from Jack. Billy Campbell: Well, you're not handling it very well. If you're not going to talk to him to get lost, I will. Amanda Woodward: No, Billy! Wait! Listen... um... I didn't know what I was getting into when I married Jack. I was young, wild, naive and immature. One night about a few months after we got married, he was supposed to be out of town on business, and I went out to dinner with some of my girlfriends, and he was waiting for me when I came back. Instead of giving me a kiss, he gave me a black eye... my first black eye. Billy Campbell: Why? Amanda Woodward: Because I went out without his permission. It's an old Sicilian tradition that the husband is in control of the wife, and Jack's father... who is just like him, encourages him to follow in his Italian heritage. The next morning, Jack told me he was sorry and promised that he wouldn't do it again. But a few months later... he did. It would happen every other week, and the only change was that he just stopped apologizing. I kept trying to get away. One time, I made it all the way to Tallahassee when his goons found me and dragged me back, threw me in the house... and when I looked up, there was my father... all bruised and bloody, down on his knees... and Jack was holding a gun to his head. Jack, his father, and their Mafia thugs told me that if I ever tried to leave Jack again, they would kill him. A few months later, my father helped me escape for good with the boating accident and all. Now... when Jack patted you on your shoulder, that was a message. I've seen it before. Jack does that when he marks someone whom he thinks is a threat to him. I just don't want to see you down on your knees with Jack holding a gun to your head. So, do us both a favor, okay? Stay away from him at all costs.
	Season 4 / Episode 2: - Melrose Is Like a Box of Chocolates Brooke Armstrong: You sorry enough to float me a loan? Hayley Armstrong: Sure. Brooke Armstrong: I know what I just said, but I can't be happy with Allison around. I've got to get away from D&D, out of that damn apartment building away from her. Hayley Armstrong: [writes a check] How to you intend to explain $100,000 to your husband? Brooke Armstrong: I don't. I'm going to get a seperate checking account at a different bank. Brooke Armstrong: Daddy? Hayley Armstrong: There is however one small condition to the money, Brooke. You don't get it... until you file for divorce.
	Season 4 / Episode 2: - Melrose Is Like a Box of Chocolates Court-Appointed Doctor: [holding up a card with a black ink smuge on it] Just tell me what you see. The first thing that pops into your mind. Dr. Kimberly Shaw Mancini: I see a depressed, middle-aged Freudian with unexpressed homosexual leanings!

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