Joe Dubois

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Jake Weber

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Joe Dubois Quotes

	Season 5 / Episode 18: - The Talented Ms. Boddicker Dist. Atty. Manuel Devalos: Your wife's a hero, Joe. Joe Dubois: I know that... I've always known that.
	Season 5 / Episode 8: - Truth Be Told Bridgette Dubois: Daddy, we need to go to bed. Joe Dubois: Okay. Bridgette Dubois: But mummy isn't here and we need our kisses. Joe Dubois: Okay. Bridgette Dubois: Well, can you come over here and give them to us? Joe Dubois: Oh, well, I kinda can't right now, sweety. Bridgette Dubois: Well then, can we come over there and get them from you? Joe Dubois: Not unless you can fly. Marie Dubois: I could fly. Bridgette Dubois: No you can't.
	Season 5 / Episode 3: - A Person of Interest Joe Dubois: Changing your name so that people won't hold what your father did against you, is that a crime?
	Season 4 / Episode 10: - Wicked Game (2) Allison Dubois: Oh, I had a real nightmare, that Cynthia Keener had a nightmare. Joe Dubois: Keener, what could possibly give that woman nightmares, other than somebody named Dorothy dropping a house on her?
	Season 4 / Episode 9: - Wicked Game (1) Joe Dubois: I still have my pity party decorations, you wanna borrow some?
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - Better Off Dead Allison Dubois: Who's the old lady with the funny hat in the boat? Joe Dubois: Oh no. You don't get to do that.
	Season 2 / Episode 13: - Raising Cain Marie DuBois: [Allison dreams of teacher about to be shot by a student he cries out but instead of his voice Marie's comes out instead] MOMMY? MOMMY? Marie DuBois: [Allison wakes up and still hears her daughter's voice] MOMMY/ Joe Dubois: What is it a bad dream? Marie DuBois: [Marie climbs into their bed] Mommy Joe Dubois: [on seeing his daughter in their bed] Oh my goodness this is a bad dream
	Season 2 / Episode 10: - The Reckoning Joe Dubois: Cockadoodle doo. Allison Dubois: Cockadoodle who? Joe Dubois: Nevermind, I take that back, it's way too early for this kind of talk. Do you know that it's barely five o'clock?
	Season 2 / Episode 8: - Too Close to Call Joe Dubois: Everything is physics.
	Season 2 / Episode 1: - When Push Comes to Shove (2) Ariel Dubois: Daddy? Joe Dubois: Yes? Ariel Dubois: I don't understand. I'm in the sixth grade. Why am I going to bed the same time as a first grader? Bridgette Dubois: Hey, it's not my fault I'm in first grade, I got born late!
	Season 1 / Episode 15: - Penny for Your Thoughts Joe Dubois: So what about this sleeping thing... you game? You wanna give it a shot?
	Season 1 / Episode 14: - In the Rough Allison Dubois: Let me ask you a question: is it completely hypocritical of me to be scared to death of the possibility of your mother living near us, while at the same time calling you at work to say do you think it would be okay if I left her with the kids for a little while, while I go to meet somebody in about half an hour? Joe Dubois: Yes, it's completely hypocritical. And I think you should do it.
	Season 1 / Episode 14: - In the Rough Mrs. Dubois: So Allison, tell me about your work. Allison Dubois: Oh, I don't know, it's part time. I work for the District Attorney. Mrs. Dubois: Sort of a paralegal thing? Joe Dubois: There's definitely some 'para,' but I do believe there's some 'legal' in there too, so...
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - A Couple of Choices Allison Dubois: Where is everybody? Joe Dubois: Well let's see. Ariel is at Hannah's... Joe Dubois: [after allison gives him confused look] oh, did i mention I'm taking you to mexico for your birthday?
	Season 1 / Episode 2: - Suspicions and Certainties Allison Dubois: I don't wanna get up. You're right, I'm depressed. Joe Dubois: You know what depression is? It's unchanneled anger. Allison Dubois: Thank you. Thank you. Everything is different now. I'm still not getting up.
	Unknown Episode: Allison Dubois: Psychic with a bad sense of time. Joe Dubois: Do you remember where you live? Allison Dubois: Hmm, I'm seeing a house. I'm seeing a guy in his underwear. I'm seeing lots of dishes in the sink. Joe Dubois: It's amazing how you do that.
	Unknown Episode: Allison Dubois: How can you say that? Joe Dubois: I move my lips, I push out air. There's nothing to it.
	Unknown Episode: Bridgette Dubois: Don't let her chop my head off! Joe Dubois: Chop your head off?
	Unknown Episode: Allison Dubois: Ow! [pulls a portable phone out of couch cushions] Joe Dubois: Wow. You one of those people who can talk out of their ass? Allison Dubois: It's not funny. Joe Dubois: It's kind of funny.
	Unknown Episode: Joe Dubois: Aren't you going to get that? Allison Dubois: Why? It's one of the wicked stepsisters calling to say she's coming to the ball, but she wants me to stop and clean her fireplace.
	Unknown Episode: Ariel Dubois: This is completely unfair! I had her first, Dad. Joe Dubois: No, point in fact, I had her first or else you wouldn't be here.
	Unknown Episode: Joe Dubois: Ever since you made the decision not to go to law school, to go to work for the D.A. as a consultant, I don't know, you seem kinda… Allison Dubois: Bitchy? Cranky? Pissed off? Joe Dubois: You can read minds.
	Unknown Episode: Joe Dubois: Call Maury Povich - tell him I'm ready for my close-up.
	Unknown Episode: Allison Dubois: He looks pretty good, don't you think? Joe Dubois: For a functional alcoholic - absolutely. You know he's still out there drinking by himself? Allison Dubois: Wow, who died and appointed you the mayor of Funville?
	Unknown Episode: Joe Dubois: Keys? I would think even to get a psychic learner's permit you'd have to be able to find a lost set of... Allison Dubois: [holding them] Keys?
	Unknown Episode: Allison Dubois: It's 9:00. How am I supposed to know you're OK? How do I know you're not lying dead somewhere? Joe Dubois: If something had happened, somebody would've called. If I were dead, who are we kidding, you'd be the first to know.
	Unknown Episode: Allison Dubois: I just had a weird dream... Joe Dubois: Of course you did. It's a day ending in "Y".

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