Fred Mertz

I Love Lucy

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Characters: #4 of 7 (Full List)

Played by:

William Frawley
William Frawley was born in Burlington, Iowa. As a boy he sang at St. Paul's Catholic Church and played ...

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Fred Mertz Quotes

	Season 5 / Episode 21: - Lucy in the Swiss Alps Ethel Mertz: Fred, I got a confession to make. Remember when we got married and I said I was 18. I was 19. Fred Mertz: Well I got a confession to make too. You were 24.
	Season 3 / Episode 17: - Oil Wells Ricky Ricardo: Now what do you think this pleasant surprise could be? Fred Mertz: Maybe they're leaving us?
	Season 3 / Episode 17: - Oil Wells Lucy Ricardo: [Lucy, dressed in a stunning, skin-tight evening gown prances into the room, showing off her new glamorous look] May I have a light, please? Thanks awfully, darling. Ricky Ricardo: Who is that? Fred Mertz: It looks like Lucy. Ricky Ricardo: Lucy? Lucy Ricardo: Yes, dah-ling? Ricky Ricardo: It is Lucy. Fred Mertz: Well, what do you know. Lucy Ricardo: [Door buzzer sounds] That must be my dear friend, Ethel. Please Fred, I'll open the door. Fred Mertz: Open it? I was going to LOCK it! Lucy Ricardo: Oh my dear fellow. You have such a refreshing wit. [Opens door] Ethel Mertz: [Ethel strolls in, dressed in a tight leopard skin evening gown] I hope I didn't hold up the party. Lucy Ricardo: Not at all, darling. Do come in. Ricky Ricardo: [Can't believe his eyes regarding Ethel's transformation] Who's that? Fred Mertz: Who's that? WHAT'S that?
	Season 1 / Episode 27: - The Kleptomaniac Fred Mertz: You don't think she's a kleptomaniac do you? Ricky Ricardo: No, I think she just steals.
	Season 1 / Episode 27: - The Kleptomaniac Fred Mertz: [Ricky finds blueprints] What is it? Ricky Ricardo: The Shashe National Bank! Dr. Tom Robinson: Oh no. That's where I keep my money! Oh this is serious!
	Season 1 / Episode 24: - The Gossip Lucy McGillicuddy Ricardo: Let's make it a bet. Fred Mertz: How about $10? Ethel Mertz: What's wrong with $20? Ricky Ricardo: What's wrong with $30? Lucy McGillicuddy Ricardo: What's wrong with $50? Fred Mertz: What was wrong with $10?
	Season 1 / Episode 21: - New Neighbors Lucy Ricardo: 10 o' clock in the living room and all's well! Ricky Ricardo: 10 o' clock in the bedroom and all is well! Fred Mertz: 10 o' clock in the hallway and all's well! Ethel Mertz: [muffled] 10 o' clock in the kitchen and all's well! Lucy Ricardo: Kitchen inspector. [Ethel comes out with a turkey leg] Ethel Mertz: Yes sir? Lucy Ricardo: Ethel, are you eating on duty? Ethel Mertz: No sir. Lucy Ricardo: What's that? Ethel Mertz: Oh uh, well I'm not very good with a gun so I thought if anybody came in the back door I'd beat 'em to death. Lucy Ricardo: I hope he gets here before you eat your club away. Fred Mertz: [entering living room] Ho, hee, ho. Lucy Ricardo: Fred, what're you doing away from your post? Fred Mertz: I'm hungry! And I demand transfer to kitchen. [Ricky enters] Lucy Ricardo: What do you want? Ricky Ricardo: I'm lonesome in there all by myself!
	Season 1 / Episode 11: - Lucy is Jealous of Girl Singer Ricky Ricardo: [while Lucy thinks that Ricky is going into the army while Ricky thinks Lucy is pregnant] Ricky Ricardo: Me daddy? Fred Mertz: Yes. You, daddy. Lucy, mommy. Me, Tarzan.
	Season 1 / Episode 3: - The Diet Ethel Mertz: What if I cried every time I put on a pound? Fred Mertz: We'd be up to our ears in tears.
	Season 1 / Episode 1: - The Girls Want to Go to the Nightclub Lucy Ricardo: What's the matter? What are you standing up for? Ricky Ricardo: Because two gorgeous ladies entered the room. Lucy Ricardo: They did? Where? Ethel Mertz: They mean us. Lucy Ricardo: Oh! You great big latin lover you! [she pinches Ricky's cheek] Ethel Mertz: Oh! You sweet, handsome man you! [she pinches Fred's cheek] Ricky Ricardo: You gorgeous, exciting, woman you! [he pinches Lucy's cheek] Fred Mertz: I pass.
	Unknown Episode: Fred Mertz: She said my mother looks like a weasel. Lucy Ricardo: Ethel, apologize. Ethel Mertz: I'm sorry your mother looks like a weasel.
	Unknown Episode: Fred Mertz: Let's just hope for the best. Lucy Ricardo: Don't worry, Fred, Ethel'll come back. Fred Mertz: I said let's hope for the BEST.
	Unknown Episode: Ricky Ricardo: Lucy's actin' crazy. Fred Mertz: Crazy for Lucy, or crazy for ordinary people?
	Unknown Episode: Ricky Ricardo: What do you know about rice? Fred Mertz: Well, I had it thrown at me on one of the darkest days in my life.
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Gee, this high altitude sure gives me an appetite. Fred Mertz: What's your excuse at sea level?
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Rome wasn't built in a day. Fred Mertz: Well, Rome wasn't built like you either.
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Where you afraid you'd lose me? Fred Mertz: I'll say, that outfit you're wearing is rented.
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Imagine me meeting a Queen face to face, I'm scared. Fred Mertz: You're scared? Think of the Queen.
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Isn't that sweet? Just like two lovebirds. Fred Mertz: What are you, a bird watcher?
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Fred, Fred, wake up sleeping beauty. Lucy Ricardo: You couldn't wake him up with a stick of dynamite. Ethel Mertz: Hey I got an idea [yells] Hey look there goes Gina Lollobrigida. Fred Mertz: [gets up from his seat excited] Where? Where? Where?
	Unknown Episode: Ricky Ricardo: Who's that? Fred Mertz: Who's that? WHAT'S that?
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: If I let my hair go like that you'd never let me hear the end of it. Fred Mertz: Honeybunch, if the rest of you looked like that I wouldn't care if you were bald.
	Unknown Episode: Lucy Ricardo: How much do you want to bet? Fred Mertz: Ten dollars. Ethel Mertz: Well what's the matter with twenty dollars? Ricky Ricardo: What's the matter with thirty dollars? Lucy Ricardo: What's the matter with fifty dollars? Fred Mertz: What was the matter with ten dollars?
	Unknown Episode: Fred Mertz: We'll sue you. Ricky Ricardo: Yeah? We'll see who's gonna sue who. Lucy Ricardo: Yeah, we'll sue who's gonna see...
	Unknown Episode: Ricky Ricardo: Fred, I've got an awful problem on my hands. Fred Mertz: You should have thought about that before you married her.
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Fred, I'm sorry I said you were a dumb bunny. Fred Mertz: And I'm sorry you're so fat you sat on my glasses and broke'em.
	Unknown Episode: Fred Mertz: Now what are we supposed to do? Thumb a ride on a passing halibut?
	Unknown Episode: Ricky Ricardo: How much rice do you think we should use for four people? Fred Mertz: I don't know. People do like that stuff. Ricky Ricardo: How does one pound per person sound? Fred Mertz: Sounds about right. Ricky Ricardo: That's good because that's what I put in: four pounds.
	Unknown Episode: Ethel Mertz: Three! Lucy Ricardo: Two! Ethel Mertz: One! One cent hamburgers. Fred Mertz: Ethel, are you out of your mind? Ethel Mertz: Well I thought this could get'em. Fred Mertz: One cent hamburgers. Customer: [Gives Ethel one dollar] I'd like a 100 hamburgers.
	Unknown Episode: Fred Mertz: [working in a diner] Adam and Eve on a raft. Wreck'em!

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