3x10 The Yips

Ted Mosby: You go to a gym, don't you?
Barney Stinson: I go to World Fitness, but I don't go to work out.
Ted Mosby: You don't?
Barney Stinson: No, I go to invest.
Barney Stinson: [at the gym] There's one of my investments. Hey, Sheila! Looking good!
Ted Mosby: You invest in women?
Barney Stinson: I invest in women who - How can I put this delicately? - They fat! I give them the attention they don't get now, and when they get hot, who do they come to? The guy who gave them attention back when they weren't.
Ted Mosby: I don't know if I should be disgusted or impressed.

Barney Stinson: That was the day I was born. I rose like a phoenix from her mentholated bosom and strode out into the world Armani-clad and fully awesome.

Barney Stinson: But you said I rocked your world. All subsequent worlds that I rocked were only so rocked because of the confidence I earned from said first world rocking.