1x07 Matchmaker - How I Met Your Mother Episode Guide

How I Met Your Mother

- Episode 01x07

Episode: 01x07
Title: Matchmaker
Type: Regular Episode
Production Code: 1ALH06
First Aired: Nov. 07, 2005

Season 1 » Episode #07 - Matchmaker

How I Met Your Mother - 01x07 Matchmaker

Summary: When Ted turns to a matchmaker to find love, he is sent away matchless.When a matchmaker with a 100 percent success rate turns Ted away because he is not compatible with any of the available women in her database, he is still determined that he is going to find his match. After getting information from the matchmaker’s computer on the sly, Ted pays a visit to a very cute, but very taken, dermatologist in an effort to debunk the prediction that there are no women out there for him. Meanwhile, Marshall and Lily are obsessed with ridding their apartment of an unsightly critter.

Watch Episode Videos

Cock-a-Mouse (01:37)

It Can Fly Too (01:24)

Eight Fish in the Sea (02:47)

Who appeared in this episode?

Ellen Pierce	played by Camryn Manheim
Dr. Sarah O'Brien	played by Beth Lacke
Sudeep	played by Nick Jaine

Episode Quotes

Season 1 / Episode 7: - Matchmaker

Barney: [at the offices of Love Solutions, a match-making agency] We're signing up!
Ted: What?
Barney: Ted, these chicks are desperate AND hot. That's a perfect cocktail: shake well then sleep with!
Ted: I'm not going to a match-maker! That's like giving up! It's the man version of getting a cat!
Barney: Come on, Ted! This is an incredible opportunity! We'll meet our soulmates, nail them and never call them again!
Ellen Pierce: [comes into the room] All finished, gentlemen? [meaning their application forms; they hand them to her] Congratulations! You've just taken your first step!
Barney: [faking demure and sensitive] Gosh! Thanks, Ellen! I sure hope this works. I'm *so* done with the single life. All the games, the meaningless sex!
Ellen Pierce: You deserve more!
Barney: That is so true, Ellen I really think I'm ready to stop being a *me* and start being a *we*. Hey, is there any way I can let it be known that I love cuddling?
Ellen Pierce: [endearingly] Of course, you can! That's so... [lost for words]
Barney: Kinda hard to talk about it with Ted here but I just want someone who's not afraid to hold me at night [gets his voice to break a little] when the tears come... Ellen, can you help me find her?
Ellen Pierce: Get out!
Barney: What?
Ellen Pierce: I get 15 guys like you every week. Jerks who just want to meet vulnerable women, nail them and never call them again!
Barney: Oh, my God! People *do* that?
Ellen Pierce: You wanna do this the easy way or the hard way?
Barney: What's the hard way? Security roughs me up and tosses me out?
Ellen Pierce: No. That's the easy way. The hard way is that I slap the crap out of you myself [Ellen is quite heavily set]
Barney: [starts for the door] Ted! Let's go!
Ellen Pierce: [to Ted] Not you! You stay. You're cute. [looking at his application] Good career. And you didn't use an obvious alias on your application like your friend *Jack Package*!
Barney: [from the other side of the door] It's pronounced *Pa-KAJ*!

Season 1 / Episode 7: - Matchmaker

Marshall: No, it wasn't a cockroach, it had fur. And only mammals have fur.
Lily: It was a cockroach.
Marshall: Come on Lily, the only way it was a cockroach was if it was wearing the skin of a mouse it just killed.
Lily: Oh my god!
Lily: Yeah, it had six legs, a hard exoskeleton like a roach!
Marshall: But it also had mouse-like characteristics, grey brown tufts of fur, a tail.
Robin: So which is it, a cockroach or a mouse?
Lily: It's a cockamouse!
Lily: It's a whole new species, the cockamouse.
Marshall: And it's the size of a potato.
Robin: So what now, a cocka-potato-mouse?
Marshall: Don't make it sound ridiculous, it's a cockamouse.

[More Quotes]

MISTAKES/GOOFS

CONT: When Marshall comes out of his room with the book about the Rosswell Conspiracy, he's holding the cover and first pages bent under the book, next shot he's just holding them normally, then they're bent again.
PLOT: After Ted returns from his appointment with the dermatologist, he tells everyone that she's engaged. A few minutes later, Lily is trying to talk him out of interfering with the wedding plans by pursuing her. She says that the doctor is getting married on Saturday. But Lily doesn't know this information. The audience knows because we heard it from the doctor at the appointment. But Ted never mentioned in the scene when the wedding was to take place and no time has passed for Lily to have learned that specific information off-screen yet.