Robin Scherbatsky

How I Met Your Mother

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Cobie Smulders
Amazingly, newcomer Cobie Smulders never gave much thought to acting. Born on April 3, 1982, in Vancouver, ...

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Robin Scherbatsky Quotes

	Season 4 / Episode 23: - As Fast as She Can Marshall Eriksen: He's rich? Please tell me he wrote you a big, fat check. A check so fat, it doesn't take its shirt off when it goes swimming. Barney Stinson: That is a big, fat check. A check so fat, after you have sex with it, you don't tell your buddies about it. Robin Scherbatsky: A check so fat, when it sits next to you on an airplane, you ask yourself if it should have bought two seats. Marshall Eriksen: That is... Barney Stinson: A big, fat check! Ted Mosby: Yeah, he didn't write me a check.
	Season 4 / Episode 23: - As Fast as She Can Marshall Eriksen: Of course Robin never got a speeding ticket. Pretty women never get speeding tickets. Robin Scherbatsky: That is outrageous!... and factual.
	Season 4 / Episode 23: - As Fast as She Can Robin Scherbatsky: [after Barney's story of how a female officer stripped for him] No, false! Did not happen! Marshall Eriksen: That was a line from a porno. I've seen that porno. Hell, I've made that porno. Barney Stinson: When will you learn that the only difference between my life and porno is that my life has better lighting?
	Season 4 / Episode 22: - Right Place Right Time Robin Scherbatsky: You better bring an umbrella. Chuckles the Weather Clown says it's going to rain. Ted Mosby: You have a clown who does the weather? That's a little cheesy, isn't it? Robin Scherbatsky: Cheesy? Tell me again what the building you're designing looks like, Hoss?
	Season 4 / Episode 21: - The Three Days Rule Robin Scherbatsky: Just don't make that naked lady noise. Ted Mosby: I don't make naked lady noises. Robin Scherbatsky: Oh, really? [Flashes Ted] Ted Mosby: He-heh. He-heh. He-heh.
	Season 4 / Episode 18: - Old King Clancy Ted Mosby: Now when I go in there, I'm probably going to be fired. Best case scenario, my boss is going to ream me out in front of everybody. Robin Scherbatsky: Back home we call that a... Lily Aldrin: ...a Saskatoon Totem Pole. It's all in here.
	Season 4 / Episode 16: - Sorry, Bro Robin Scherbatsky: Stupid monkey.
	Season 4 / Episode 16: - Sorry, Bro Barney Stinson: Think of the funniest thing ever. Robin Scherbatsky: Got it. Barney Stinson: Now double it. Robin Scherbatsky: A chimpanzee with two tuxedos?
	Season 4 / Episode 15: - The Stinsons Grant: By the way, I like your nose job. Robin Scherbatsky: Thanks, but I didn't get a nose job. Grant: Right. Me neither.
	Season 4 / Episode 15: - The Stinsons Marshall Eriksen: You're telling me that when you watch "The Karate Kid", you don't root for Daniel-san? Ted Mosby: Who do you root for in "Die Hard"? Barney Stinson: Hans Gruber. Charming international bandit. In the end, he dies hard. He's the title character. Lily Aldrin: What about "The Breakfast Club"? Barney Stinson: The teacher running detention. He's the only guy in the whole movie wearing a suit. Robin Scherbatsky: I've got one. "The Terminator". Barney Stinson: What's the name of the movie, Robin? Who among us did not shed a tear when his little red eye went out in the end, and he didn't get to kill all those people? [Breaks down] I'm sorry. I just get so emotional. Ted Mosby: I am never watching a movie with you again. Barney Stinson: They didn't even try to help him!
	Season 4 / Episode 13: - Three Days of Snow Robin Scherbatsky: Okay, these little rituals, telling each other what you ate, they're childish. You're like children playing house. Marshall Eriksen: You know why you don't like them? It's because you've never been in a relationship long enough to develop them. Robin Scherbatsky: What? Marshall Eriksen: You don't understand love. You're like a robot who asks someone who's crying "Why is your face leaking?" Robin Scherbatsky: Okay, robot initiating parking-on-the-curb-until-jackass-apologizes sequence. Beeb-bob-boop-beep-booooop! Marshall Eriksen: Okay, my robot was like a million times better.
	Season 4 / Episode 12: - Benefits Ted Mosby: [Seeing Robin eat cereal] That looks good. I'll have some of that. Robin Scherbatsky: Sorry. No milk. Ted Mosby: But I just saw a carton of milk in the fridge yesterday. Robin Scherbatsky: It's empty. Ted Mosby: Then throw it away. Robin Scherbatsky: Can't. Trashcan's full. Ted Mosby: So empty the trash. Robin Scherbatsky: I would, but I'm eating cereal.
	Season 4 / Episode 12: - Benefits Robin Scherbatsky: Haven't you tried not reading a magazine while "reading a magazine"? Marshall Eriksen: You have to read a magazine! That's why there are magazines! Ted Mosby: Otherwise, it's just a waste of our time.
	Season 4 / Episode 12: - Benefits Robin Scherbatsky: Last night, I did it while returning a bunch of phone calls. Marshall Eriksen: I knew you didn't get a rowing machine!
	Season 4 / Episode 12: - Benefits Robin Scherbatsky: By the way, our little arrangement is off. Barney Stinson: Oh, that's awes... ful. Robin Scherbatsky: What? Barney Stinson: That's awesful.
	Season 4 / Episode 11: - Little Minnesota Ted Mosby: It's freezing out there! Where's your coat? Robin Scherbatsky: Ted, I'm Canadian - I don't need a coat. This kind of weather does nothing for me. Marshall Eriksen: Yeah, this is like a spring day back in Minnesota if it wasn't for all the taxis and skyscrapers, and non-white people. Ted Mosby: There aren't any Black people in Minnesota? Marshall Eriksen: Not if Prince is on tour.
	Season 4 / Episode 10: - The Fight Ted Mosby: We gotta find a new place. I don't want to be known as the guy who was left at the altar. Barney Stinson: Good Times. Ted Mosby: Uh-oh, we lost Barney. Robin Scherbatsky: Huh? Lily Aldrin: He's looking at that woman in the tight red sweater, and he's not listening to a word we're saying. Ted Mosby: Barney has learned that he can fake a conversation by listing black sitcoms from the '70s and '80s. Right, Barney? Barney Stinson: Diff'rent Strokes! Lily Aldrin: Hey, Barney. Wanna go with me and do stuff that I don't even let Marshall do to me? Barney Stinson: What's Happenin'?
	Season 4 / Episode 8: - Woooo! Lily Aldrin: Hey, I can woo. Robin Scherbatsky: That's not true. Lily Aldrin: I could too. Robin Scherbatsky: It's just not you.
	Season 4 / Episode 7: - Not a Father's Day Marshall Eriksen: So, how's the job hunt going? Robin Scherbatsky: Didn't you hear? I got a job at CNN this morning. And I moved to a penthouse made of gold overlooking Central Park. Get your head out of your ass, Marshall.
	Season 4 / Episode 7: - Not a Father's Day Robin Scherbatsky: What's that? Lily Aldrin: One of Jeremy's socks. I'm having a baby! Robin Scherbatsky: But what about all the things we talked about? Lily Aldrin: But... but sock! Robin Scherbatsky: What about Marshall working all the time? Lily Aldrin: But sock! Robin Scherbatsky: What about Project Lily? Lily Aldrin: It's got little fishies on it! Robin Scherbatsky: All this discussion, and a sock makes your decision for you? Ted Mosby: I guess that's what you call a sock-er punch.
	Season 4 / Episode 7: - Not a Father's Day Robin Scherbatsky: Babies are scary. They got big eyes, and that soft spot... If there was a self-destruct button, at least it should be somewhere hard to get at.
	Season 4 / Episode 7: - Not a Father's Day Lily Aldrin: Marshall and I made this big decision to have... dinner... and I thought I was ready to have... dinner... but then he called and canceled and it got me thinking, is it too early for us to have... dinner? Ted Mosby: Well, I had an early lunch, so I'm ready for dinner Lily Aldrin: Dinner is a baby Robin Scherbatsky: Lily, that's horrible!
	Season 4 / Episode 6: - Happily Ever After Ted Mosby: This is a map of Stella-free areas. The white areas are safe, the red ones are not, the blue ones are water. Lily Aldrin: Ted, that's ridiculous. Robin Scherbatsky: Well, water is blue.
	Season 4 / Episode 4: - Intervention Robin Scherbatsky: Dear Marshall: I do not like that stupid hat. I want to beat it with a bat. I want to stab it with a fork. It makes you look like such a dork.
	Season 4 / Episode 3: - I Heart NJ Robin Scherbatsky: You should have seen some of the other women auditioning. They're all more experienced and more ethnic than me. There was a black woman with green eyes. I can't compete with that!
	Season 3 / Episode 20: - Miracles Robin Scherbatsky: I love Bruce Springsteen. He's like the American Bryan Adams.
	Season 3 / Episode 20: - Miracles Robin Scherbatsky: A pencil going up Barney's nose is not a miracle. Marshall Eriksen: Then what other explanation do you have? Robin Scherbatsky: Uh... a drunken fool with a box full of pencils? Marshall Eriksen: Yeah, a drunken fool called God, and a box of pencils called Destiny!
	Season 3 / Episode 19: - Everything Must Go Marshall Eriksen: Okay, today's category, classic westerns that involve red cowboy boots. Robin. Robin Scherbatsky: The good, the bad and the fabulous. Lily Aldrin: The magnificent Kevin. Marshall Eriksen: No country for straight men.
	Season 3 / Episode 19: - Everything Must Go Robin Scherbatsky: I really like this painting. It's neat. The colors are neat, the shapes are neat, the overall painting is... neat.
	Season 3 / Episode 19: - Everything Must Go Ted Mosby: Clarify something about your critique. Do you think the colors are neat or neato-burrito? Robin Scherbatsky: At least I'm not wearing red cowboy boots. Ted Mosby: I'm pulling them off!

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