Becky's Inner Voice: I, Becky Faye Jackson, am the hottest bitch at McKinley High School. I'm not only co-captain of the Cheerios!, I'm president of the Perfect Attendance Club and I've won a participation award in rhythm gymnastics. You may be wondering why I sound like the Queen of England. It's simple: in my mind, I can sound like whomever I want, so lay off, haters. Okay, let's get reals. I could easily snag any dude east of the Mississippi, but I'm extremely picky. [looks at Rory] For instance, Rory grins too much. He looks like an insane person. [looks at Puck] Is that a mohawk, Puckerman, or did someone glue a squirrel to your head? No Chang do. I'm no rice queen. [looks at Artie] Now that's more like it: sweet, sexy and handi-capable like me, with a voice as velvety as my favorite Sunday church dress. It's decided: Artie Abrams, you're my new boyfriend.

Roz Washington: Sam Evans? I'm Coach Roz Washington. And you are one strange looking kid. I've never seen lips like that on a white child, and one of your nipples is higher than the other. I bet you've had to overcome a lot with those crooked nipples. Well, I know a thing or two about overcoming. When I was growing up, they said that black folks couldn't swim. But I had a DREAM! that one day I would get to the promised land. So I swam out there and got my forty acres and a pool.
Vinny: Coach Roz was an Olympian.
Roz Washington: That's right. I won this Bronze damn Olympic Medal in Beijing, China for individual synchronized swimming. I bet you didn't even know there was such a thing as individual synchronized swimming. Nod to me if I'm getting trough to you, nod to me!
Sam Evans: [nods]
Roz Washington: I'm gonna say one thing to you, Sam Evans, and I'm only gonna say it once. If you pee in my pool, I will kill you.