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Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends
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Wilt Quotes
 | Unknown Episode: Wilt: I'm sorry, but this is NOT okay! |
 | Season 4 / Episode 4: - Neighbor Pains Wilt: Just keep them occupied. Eduardo: But how I do that? Wilt: Make small talk. Eduardo: Small talk. Small talk... Flies. Peanuts. Dimes. Oh, and sweaters. They get muy, muy small in the wash. |
 | Season 3 / Episode 9: - Land of the Flea Wilt: I'm sorry, but why would you want fleas? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Because Eduardo has them! He always gets everything cool. |
 | Season 3 / Episode 1: - Eddie Monster Mac: I think Whizby's a little too intense for you. Maybe we could go inside and eat some potatoes. You like potatoes, right? Eduardo: But I could choke. Wilt: How about we just sit around and read? Eduardo: Paper cut! Coco: Co co-co? Wilt: Yeah, Eduardo. Can we stand? Eduardo: But your feets could get tired. Eduardo: The feets! Beware the tired feets! |
| Season 3 / Episode 1: - Eddie Monster Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: [disapprovingly] I don't know whose plan this was. Wilt: It was yours. Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: And it's genius. |
 | Season 2 / Episode 12: - Bloo Done It Uncle Pockets: [Uncle Pockets, considered to be "the best imaginary friend ever" has returned to Foster's] When I was first imagined I was happy as could be / but through the years my boy matured and he grew too old for me / without a home to call my own I wandered in the streets / until I met a sweet old Madame and she said "Come with me!" / she took me in, gave me a bed, and three square meals a day / through the years I watched Foster's grow but not long did I stay / a sweet little girl adopted me and I became her friend / but she too grew and returned me here where I was adopted again and again. [starts singing] I'm a professional friend, imaginary / I've had kids tall, short, and hairy / I'm a professional friend, imaginary / I'm agreeable to all, except dairy. Wilt: How many kids have you had? Uncle Pockets: More than you could count! Eduardo: But don't you ever miss them? Uncle Pockets: Not even a small amount! Uncle Pockets: [singing] I'm a professional friend, imaginary / upon return I'm never wary / I'm a professional friend, imaginary / I love everyone, except Gary! [to Gary] You know what you did! Just kidding! [he laughs] Uncle Pockets: [continues singing] I'm a professional friend, imaginary / I'm tops on the best friend list / I'm a professional friend, imaginary / the best friend to exist / the best friend to exist / the best friend to... E-XIST! / the best friend to exist! Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: [scowling] Pssh! Anyone can do that! [starts singing, mocking Uncle Pockets; Mac watches him] La-la-la, look at me / dancing around / my name's Bloo / I'm the best... around. Mac: You just rhymed "around" with "around". Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: [imitating Mac] "You just wehn ah-meh neh meh-neh." |
 | Season 2 / Episode 9: - Beat with a Schtick Wilt: How's the weather up there? Well, how's the weather down *there*? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Partially cloudy, 20% chance of... This isn't helping me. |
| Season 2 / Episode 9: - Beat with a Schtick Wilt: You're finally getting what you deserve. Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: A race car bed? I'm finally getting a race car bed? Wilt: No. You're getting your just desserts. A taste of your own medicine. Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Is it bubble-gum flavored? |
| Season 2 / Episode 4: - Sight for Sore Eyes / Bloo's Brothers Wilt: Well, if it isn't Ditchy Mcabandonpants. |
| Unknown Episode: Mac: Say, Wilt. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? Wilt: Why? Mac: To get to the bottom! |
| Unknown Episode: Wilt: No, Ed, no! Not blowing! The other way! The other way! Eduardo: Other way? Wilt: Yeah, yeah! That's really sucking! Eduardo: [sighs] There's no pleasing him. |
| Unknown Episode: Eduardo: Donde esta el pollo loco? Wilt: I don't know where that crazy chicken went. |
| Unknown Episode: Wilt: Who are you gonna call? Coco: Co-coco! Wilt: They've been out of business for years. |
| Unknown Episode: Wilt: Hey, how ya doing? Name's Wilt. [Mac and Bloo stare up at Wilt for a long time] Yo, guys! Hello? Oh, I get it. Is cool, is cool. I know I'm all broken, with the wonky eye and the stubby arm. Probably freaks you out, huh? Don't worry, I'll get someone else... Mac, Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: You're tall! Wilt: Oh, well, yeah. Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: You should play basketball. Wilt: Oh, well, actually I used to... sure. So, how about that tour? |
| Unknown Episode: Wilt: I'm sorry, but... |
| Unknown Episode: Wilt: Oh guys, this is Eduardo. He's one of the nicest imaginary friends here at Foster's! He couldn't hurt a fly! Eduardo: Oh si, I'm too scared of them anyway! |
| Unknown Episode: Coco: Coco? Mac: No, thanks. Coco: Coco? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Yes! Coco: Coco? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Yes! Coco: Coco? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Yes! Coco: Coco? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Yes! Coco: Coco? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: [shouts] Yes! Coco: Coco? Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: [shouts] Yes! With marshmallows! Wilt: Oh, no, Bloo. This is Coco. She wasn't asking you if you *wanted* cocoa, it's just that... well, all she ever says is "Coco." Coco: Coco! Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Then what *was* she asking? Wilt: [imitating Groucho Marx] You want any juice? |
| Unknown Episode: Mac: All right, guys! Let's bloo this! Wilt: Aww, Man! I'm sorry, but that was not *ok*! Eduardo: Muy stinko! Coco: [shouts] Coco! Terrence: Lame! That was stupider than even me! Blooregard "Bloo" Q. Kazoo: Yeah, Mac! C'mon! "Let's bloo this?" That was so stupid! |
| Unknown Episode: Wilt: [explaining an imaginary friend who looks like Mojo Jojo from "The Powerpuff Girls"] Some kids aren't that creative, so they just copy what they see on TV. What you gonna do? |
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