jaaa
dushyanth…
skr00ples
 | Unknown Episode: Judge Vance: All right, young man, call your first witness. Steve Urkel: Your Honor, I would like to call Waldo Faldo! Waldo: Okay, but I'm not home. |
| Unknown Episode: Carl: I needed a good laugh. Steve Urkel: You know, every time you laugh you burn off three and a half calories? Carl: Maybe I should laugh a little bit more, huh? |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: Oh, Laura, my love. The wind has chapped my lips. Would you care to heal them with a kiss? |
| Unknown Episode: Boyd Higgins: Name's Boyd Higgins, but ym friends call me Buck! Eddie: Name's Eddie Winslow, but my friends call me... Eddie. Rodney Beckett: I'm Rodney, but my friends call me Rod-meister. Steve Urkel: And I'm Steve Urkel! And I don't get many calls! |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: I bought two tickets to a concert that Laura wants to go to and offered to take her as my, get this, date! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Ooh, that's nice! Steve Urkel: Well, no, it's not nice! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: It's not? Steve Urkel: Well, Laura doesn't want a date with me. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Are you sure? Steve Urkel: Oh, positive. Shen I suggested it, her lovely eyes were momentarily clouded with nausea. |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: I've never tried out for athletics before and the equipment list says that every guy should wear a cup. Coach Westfield: That's right. Steve Urkel: Well, I didn't have one. So, is it all right with you? I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. |
| Unknown Episode: Carl: What's up? Steve Urkel: Well, actually, this is Eddie's story. All you'll hear from me is an occasional, 'Mmmhmm, that's right.' Eddie: That's enough, Steve. Steve Urkel: Mmmhmm, that's right. |
| Unknown Episode: Carl: There is a guy on our couch who says I remember him, but I don't remember him. Harriette: Well, tell him you don't remember him. Carl: I can't tell him I don't remember him! Because, I already told him I do remember him. So, if I tell him I don't remember him, I'll look like a jerk and I still won't remember him. Harriette: Well, if he remembers you, he's used to you looking like a jerk. |
| Unknown Episode: Carl: Uh-oh. That's Lt. Murtaugh. This could be an emergency and I'm not even dressed yet! [runs upstairs] Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Carl hasn't moved that fast since he chased a doughnut down hill. |
| Unknown Episode: Laura: How long have we known each other? Steve Urkel: Nine years, three months, two weeks, four days, six hours, eight minutes, and fourteen seconds... fifteen seconds... sixteen seconds. |
| Unknown Episode: Eddie: Look at those beaches. Laura: Look a those sunsets. Rachel Crawford: Look at those men. Carl: Look at that buffet. |
| Unknown Episode: Laura: Look, I owe you an apology. The only reason I asked you to be my partner was because I was worried about my grade. When I said my feelings for you might change, I was lying. And I'm sorry. Steve Urkel: So, you used me! You trifled with my emotions! I offered you my heart and you stomped that sucker flat! Laura: Yes. Steve Urkel: No biggie! |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: [entering] Hi gang! [shocked] Laura!... Bazooms! [faints] |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: I have a spectacular evening planned! Laura: We're not going anywhere until the ground rules are straight. First of all, this is not a real date. It's a "non-date". Second, no one must ever know about this "non-date". Third, if you touch me at any time, the "non-date" is over. Steve Urkel: Well, what if you trip or something? Laura: Just let me fall! The rest of the rules are covered in this contract. Steve Urkel: [reading] "No mouth breathing, no snorting, no drooling". Who does these things? They're disgusting. Where do I sign? |
| Unknown Episode: Eddie: Did Halle Berry return my phone call? Harriette: Something on this planet! |
| Unknown Episode: Lt. Murtaugh: Keep the pace, Mr. Backwards Hat! |
| Unknown Episode: Carl: 3, 2, 1... 1, 2, 3... What the heck is bothering me? |
| Unknown Episode: Carl: Go home, Steve. Steve Urkel: But Carl... Carl: Go home, Steve! Steve Urkel: Now, Big Guy... Carl: Go home! Go home! Go home! Steve Urkel: I don't have to take this! I'm going home! |
| Unknown Episode: Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Way to go Carl! |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: My "play-ground pass"? How much will that cost me? Baby Girl: We'll take all you've got. Steve Urkel: But, that's all I've got! |
| Unknown Episode: Eddie: Hey Waldo, how do I look? Waldo: With your eyes. |
| Unknown Episode: Harriette: [sobbing] Clint is driving off and Meryl will never see him again! Isn't that sad? Carl: I'll tell you what's sad Harriette, I've watched two full hours of the "Bridges Of Madison County" and Clint didn't blow up one bridge! |
| Unknown Episode: Laura: Get a life, Steve! Steve Urkel: All right! This is fantastic! Laura: What are you so happy about? Steve Urkel: You said, "Get a life, Steve", A week ago you would have said, "Get a life, TURBONERD". I'm wearin' you down baby, I'm wearin' you DOWWWWNN! |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: Got any cheese? |
| Unknown Episode: Laura: Steve Urkel, you are the most annoying human being that I have ever met! Steve Urkel: [Talking to Eddie and his girlfriend] You heard her, you're all witnesses. She actually said, "Human Being". She's mine! |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: Oh, Gosh golly, Jeepers Creepers. Should I be getting some Handi-Wipes? Laura and Maxine: Stay out of this! Steve Urkel: [while Laura and Maxine hit Steve with two Boston Cream Pies] No, AAH!, WAAAH! And I just got the wax sucked out of my ears! |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: State your name. Waldo: Illinois. Steve Urkel: No... state your name... not name your state. Waldo: Oh, Waldo Faldo... from Illinois. |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: [ice pack on his head from a hangover, Carl just told him a story from his drinking days] Eh he he, ow, eh he he ow, [snorts] WHOOAAOOH! Never snort with a hangover! |
| Unknown Episode: Waldo: What are you doing, Willie? Willie Fuffner: I'm gonna get Urkel! Waldo: But, why ya gonna do that, Willie? Willie Fuffner: Because, he humiliated me! Waldo: But, you humiliate me every day. Willie Fuffner: [sigh] That's different. You're my friend. Waldo: Oh yeah. |
| Unknown Episode: Steve Urkel: A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Laura: Yeah, but what are you gonna do? |
Facebook
Twitter