Faerie Tale Theatre Quotes

Faerie Tale Theatre

- Episode Quotes

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Faerie Tale Theatre Quotes

	Unknown Episode: The King: Bills, bills, bills, nothing but bills! A thousand five hundred franks for muskets? Why the huntsmen have been shotfired in this kingdom for years! The King: Two thousand franks for oranges? They might as well squeeze me dry!
	Unknown Episode: The Soldier: You know, most women your age are already married. Jeanetta: I take that as a compliment, soldier. My father has been trying to marry me off for years, but I am not marrying kind. The Soldier: Oh really? I would have thought otherwise. Jeanetta: No. I have no patience for hearts and flowers and young men who brag about this victory and that. There's more to life than romance.
	Unknown Episode: The Soldier: Eh, this cloak is a dud... God king Wenceslas, where's my arm? My arm is gone!
	Unknown Episode: The Soldier: Oh, hello. Jeanetta: Hello. The Soldier: And to what do I owe the honour of this visit, hmmm? Jeanetta: Well my sisters and I thought you might like some cookies and milk before retiring. The Soldier: Cookies and Milk? Oh, my favorite. Is that your father over there? [pours milk out in plant while Jeanetta turns her head]
	Unknown Episode: Loretta: [playing checkers] You're really fun! You certainly aren't dull like all those princes. The Soldier: Maybe that's because I'm not a prince. Loretta: Do you think I'm pretty? The Soldier: Do I think you're pretty? I think you're very pretty. Loretta: Would you pick me to marry? The Soldier: I might. Except I'm a little bit older than you and I think that maybe you should be with some young, handsome man, someone who can keep up with you. Loretta: I should? The Soldier: Definitely. [places checker piece down] King me.
	Unknown Episode: Fairy Godmother: Honey, where are your glass slippers? Cinderella: Oh, Fairy Godmother, something terrible happened. I was kicking the stones as I was walking down the cobbleway... Fairy Godmother: What? Cinderella: [Whips out the glass slippers] Gotcha!
	Unknown Episode: Cinderella: Do you know anything about kissing? Prince Henry: Yes. I'm almost certain it has something to do with the lips.
	Unknown Episode: Prince Henry: I don't even know her name. King: You don't even know her name? What have you been calling her all this while, Hey, you?
	Unknown Episode: King: Say you'll marry the girl who fits this slipper. Prince Henry: Oh, that's a wonderful idea! King: Of course, I'm the King.
	Unknown Episode: Stepmother: She's just Cinderella. She's nothing but a nothing. Prince Henry: As they say, madam, it takes one to know one.
	Unknown Episode: Fairy Godmother: I love my work.
	Unknown Episode: Bertha: That's such a gorgeous dress! Where did you have it made? Cinderella: Oh, it's just something I poofed together. Prince Henry: Poofed? Cinderella: Did I say poofed? Oh, I meant put together.
	Unknown Episode: Cinderella: Fairy godmother, where are you? It's not funny anymore. It's all just a cruel joke. I wish there wasn't any magic and I wish you'd never come here. Because then I wouldn't know what I'd be missing. I'm hopelessly in love and now I'll never see him again. I love you, Prince Henry.
	Unknown Episode: Arlene: Ohhh Mother this hurts! Stepmother: I told you Arlene, that glass slipper is supposedly VERY tiny. YOU HAVE GOT TO SHRINK THOSE FEET! Bertha: You know something? I think I may have lost a glass slipper. YES, I'M ALMOST POSITIVE!
	Unknown Episode: Prince Henry: It's a perfect fit. I've found my princess. Cinderella: Thank you, I've been looking for that everywhere. Arlene: She cheated!
	Unknown Episode: Alfred: My feet are killing me. Prince Henry: And their feet are killing me. If I see one more fallen arch I'll scream.
	Unknown Episode: Fairy Godmother: What's reality, does anybody know? [disappears]
	Unknown Episode: King: What a beautiful lady. Well, are you going to introduce me? Prince Henry: We're dancing, Father. King: So? I'm the King, introduce me. Cinderella: I've heard so much about you. Prince Henry: Can you come back again later? Please? King: All right... No need to get huffy.
	Unknown Episode: Cinderella: I'm sorry I didn't recognize you. Prince Henry: That's all right. In fact, it's quite refreshing. I get tired of being recognized all the time. Of course, it's hard to stay anonymous when your face is on all the money.
	Unknown Episode: Fairy Godmother: I've been wanting to do that for a long time.
	Unknown Episode: Cinderella: But Fairy Godmother, isn't it a little cruel to turn them into rabbits? Fairy Godmother: They'll be back to normal at midnight. Prince Henry: Midnight? Midnight! Then that explains... Fairy Godmother: Not only handsome, but smart.
	Unknown Episode: Fairy Godmother: Honey, I'm your fairy godmother. Didn't you see me "poof" next to you?
	Unknown Episode: Bertha: Would you like something to drink? Perhaps some ham?
	Unknown Episode: Stepmother: It's just Cinderella. She's nothing but a nothing. Prince Henry: Madam, it takes one, as they say, to know one.
	Unknown Episode: Paul: [to Tina] Tell me, Bacon Bits, where've you been all my life?
	Unknown Episode: Larry: [to his brothers] We could form a band and call ourselves "Peter, Paul and Larry"
	Unknown Episode: Buck Wolf: [to a twittering songbird] Shut up, I'm thinking!
	Unknown Episode: Peter: [after Larry suggests installing a stained-glass window] Why would I want to stain my window? I just cleaned it.
	Unknown Episode: Prince Richard: I want something soft and warm, like... a hamster. The Fool: A hamster? Prince Richard: Yes, you see, if I had a hamster, I could teach it little tricks like -- The Fool: Ah, Richie, what I think you need is a wife. Prince Richard: A wife? The Fool: Yeah. Prince Richard: Would that be better than a hamster? The Fool: Much.
	Unknown Episode: Prince Richard: You've infected my milk!

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