Even Stevens Quotes

Even Stevens

- Episode Quotes

Fun Facts:

	Season 3 / Episode 22: - Leavin' Stevens Beans: Getting a little hippy there, eh, Professor Cuddle-Bottoms?
	Season 3 / Episode 22: - Leavin' Stevens Steve Stevens: This box is heavy! Eileen Stevens: And why are there holes in it? Beans: [bursts out of the box; Steve and Eileen scream] So I can breath. Steve Stevens: Beans, you're not coming to Washington with us. Beans: Come on! You'll never know I'm there. Steve Stevens: Out! Home, now! Beans: Fine, but you're gonna miss me!
	Season 3 / Episode 22: - Leavin' Stevens Beans: Her pillow smells nice. My pillow smells like macarroni and cheese.
	Season 3 / Episode 22: - Leavin' Stevens Tawny Dean: As long as I live I'm...I'm never gonna meet anybody like you. Louis Stevens: I'm gonna miss you so much. I love you, Tawny. Tawny Dean: I love you, Louis.
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - Stevens Manor Louis Stevens: Of course the crown jewel of the garden cafe is the lovely Tawny Dean, she's the piano player here. We call her the human jukebox, because she knows all kinds of songs. Kitna Twin: Does she know "I hate this place, we should've gone to Hawaii?" Tawny Dean: [improvising a song] I hate this place / We should've gone to Hawaii / Where they say "aloha" / And roast little piggies.
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - Stevens Manor Tom Gribalski: Can you imagine skiing down those slopes with hot potatoes in your pockets? Tom Gribalski: To keep your hands warm.
	Season 3 / Episode 18: - Stevens Manor Steve Stevens: Honey, whose turn is it to scream? Eileen Stevens: Yours.
	Season 3 / Episode 17: - Snow Job Louis Stevens: If a chicken had lips could it whistle?
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Beans on the Brain Beans: I hate fish. They smell like fish.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Beans on the Brain Louis Stevens: I see two-head people.
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Beans on the Brain Beans: I wanted you guys to meet my cousin. Louis Stevens: There's MORE of you?
	Season 3 / Episode 16: - Beans on the Brain Louis Stevens: You were a lot of fun. But when I reached in to kiss you, I saw something. Chris: Stars? Fireworks? Louis Stevens: No, it was Beans.
	Season 3 / Episode 12: - The King Sloppy (aka The Big Sloppy) Jane: Actually, I'm not a princess. My father's a duke. Alan Twitty: It's okay. I know how you feel. My dad can be like that too sometimes.
	Season 3 / Episode 12: - The King Sloppy (aka The Big Sloppy) Louis Stevens: [as Mike Hageman] On second thought, my bladder's only half full, or half empty... depending on your world view.
	Season 3 / Episode 11: - Hardly Famous Tawny Dean: Not a day goes by that I don't think about him. I mean, I know it sounds kinda crazy, but...when we looked into each other's eyes, it was deep and powerful...like, like we was searchin' for stars in a black sky... And how he could make me laugh! Oh, I remember this one time, he ate so many plums, his mouth turned as purple as the hydrangeas in Grandma's window box... How could he just disappear like that, leavin' me nothin' but a hole in my heart? I never even got a chance...to say goodbye! I'll always miss him, and I'll always love him. 'Cause he wasn't just a turtle--he was my best friend.
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - Short Story Louis Stevens: Now listen, the school ain't big enough for the both of us, so you just get out of here, and never besmirch my name again, Loomis. Loomis Freeman: What's "besmirch" mean? Louis Stevens: "Besmirch"? I don't what "besmirch"...
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - Short Story Twitty: Dude, you've gotta find Loomis. Louis Stevens: You can say that three times fast. Twitty: You've gotta find Loomis, you've gotta find Loomis, you've gotta find Loomis...
	Season 3 / Episode 9: - Short Story Louis Stevens: [trying to trick Loomis into giving him the water balloon] Ok man, you win, there's no way I can get you. Oh, you got a little something on your nose, a little booger hanging out there Loomis Freeman: [checking his nose] What? Where? Louis Stevens: [grabs the balloon while Loomis is distracted] What now buddy! What now!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Close Encounters of the Beans Kind Louis Stevens: Some guy came for you Beans. Beans: I don't know him. Louis Stevens: I haven't even said his name yet.
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Close Encounters of the Beans Kind Twitty: Some guy was looking for you today, Beans. Beans: I've never heard of him. Twitty: Yeah, I didn't even say his name yet, buddy. But his name is Mason. Beans: I've never heard of him either. Louis Stevens: He said he knows about the Long Journey Home. Beans: I don't know what you're talking about. I have to go.
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Close Encounters of the Beans Kind Beans: Does "gassy" have two "S"'s or three?
	Season 3 / Episode 5: - Band on the Roof Louis Stevens: What's living if you never pull your shorts down and slide on the ice Ren?
	Season 3 / Episode 5: - Band on the Roof Louis Stevens: Jiminy H. Crickets III Jr...
	Season 3 / Episode 5: - Band on the Roof Louis Stevens: What's living if you never pull your shorts down and slide on the ice, Ren?
	Season 3 / Episode 4: - Your Toast Ren Stevens: The only job I've ever had is a lemonade stand. Ruby: There you go, extensive food related experience.
	Season 3 / Episode 3: - My Best Friend's Girlfriend Tom Gribalski: [trying to climb a fence] Ut-oh, I think I just ripped my trousers. Louis Stevens: Are you kidding me? Tom Gribalski: I did. I have to go.
	Season 3 / Episode 2: - Where in the World Is Pookie Stevens? Ren Stevens: Why didn't you tell me you found Mr. Pookie? Louis Stevens: Because, you know, you get all screamy, and mushy, jumping, crying, hugging... it's just horrible. Ren Stevens: All right. Louis Stevens: Ren, what am I supposed to do with the drumsticks? REN? Family: SURPRISE. Louis Stevens: [Drops backpack] Oh... Thank you so much ma. Ren Stevens: Thanks for not getting mushy.
	Season 3 / Episode 2: - Where in the World Is Pookie Stevens? Eileen Stevens: Louis, where are your pants? Louis Stevens: [smiling and counting money] I sold them... for six bucks.
	Season 3 / Episode 1: - The Kiss Tawny Dean: I've never had a boyfriend before. Louis Stevens: Me neither.
	Season 3 / Episode 1: - The Kiss Tom Gribalski: Louis, your honor has been besmirched. A real man would march up to that Zach Estrada and box his ears. Alan Twitty: Uh, Tom? A real man would never say "box his ears".

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