Drawn Together Quotes

Drawn Together

- Episode Quotes

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Drawn Together Quotes

	Season 3 / Episode 11: - Drawn Together Babies Xandir P. Wifflebottom: [to Captain Hero] Your such a tattle tale you adopted homo!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Hot Topic Manager: What part of "We need to evacuate" do you not understand?!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Princess Clara: I haven't seen a bovine with such kind eyes since Mother Teresa died!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Foxxy Love: Are you done? Princess Clara: I'm not sure. How do you know when you're done killing something? Foxxy Love: When your man pick you up from the clinic and take you drinking at the club.
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Xandir P Whifflebottom: I'm leading us out of this van, like Moses led the Jews out of the desert, to the world's everlasting regret.
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Xandir P Whifflebottom: So, like the time Fernando and I went to a diner and ordered a bowl of soup to split, but we didn't feel like crackers, we got a roll!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Toot Braunstein: I know it's against gay policy, but spit it out!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Xandir P Whifflebottom: There is hope. As long as we're together. Drawn- Spanky Ham: If you say "Drawn Together", I swear to Christ I'm going to cave your skull in with a tyre iron and eat what drips out! Xandir P Whifflebottom: All right. Fair enough.
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Wooldoor Sockbat: We can't all keep dying and then coming back to life the next episode! It's totally illogical! Ling-Ling: [who was earlier killed and eaten] Tell me about it!
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Hot Topic Manager: Do you think Hot Topic can support itself by selling Hello Kitty coin purses and Invader ZIM steering wheel covers? What kind of business model is that?
	Season 3 / Episode 8: - Lost in Parking Space, Part Two Princess Clara: And so, like a roadie for Cher, I traveled the Earth at Satan's side.
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Spanky Ham: You pathetic fools! Now we're all gonna die! Excludie: Even me?! Spanky Ham: No! Not you, Excludie! Now, here's a blanket and a thermos of delicious hot cocoa. Excludie: Aww... [walks off]
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Excludie: You can say that again. Toot Braunstein: Shut up, Excludie! Excludie: Aww... [walks off]
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Captain Hero: Oh yay! I can't wait to go to Baby Gap, In-N-Out Burger, Foot Locker, and all the other euphemisms for vagina.
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Foxxy Love: Oh my God, he's got a Puerto Rican credit card!
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Xandir P Whifflebottom: Well Xandir, like the Grateful Dead, you've gotten us into yet another stupid jam.
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Foxxy Love: Clara? I'm sick of that Bible-humping bitch. Besides, what fun is doing a group activity if you can't exclude somebody?
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Xandir P Whifflebottom: Today's the day you promised we'd all go to the mall together. Captain Hero: I thought today was the day you were going to shut the fuck up!
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Kirk Cameron: To learn about your unavoidable descent into hell via the impending rapture, press one.
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Foxxy Love: The "King of the Hill" boredom helmet! Foxxy Love: It's almost as boring as the show itself!
	Season 3 / Episode 7: - Lost In Parking Space, Part One Princess Clara: Get up, black person! Time to repent!
	Season 3 / Episode 2: - Wooldoor Sockbat's Giggle-Wiggle Funny Tickle Non-Traditional Progressive Multicultural Roundtable! Wooldoor Sockbat: [singing] So clench your teeth and not ethnicity
	Season 2 / Episode 14: - Alzheimer's That Ends Well Spanky Ham: [in a sarcastic tone] Ooh, look at me. I'm old. I don't know what DVDs are.
	Season 2 / Episode 13: - A Very Special Drawn Together Afterschool Special Wooldoor Sockbat: [the housemates are role-playing, Wooldoor speaks to Xandir] "Now, you be the gay's dad". Xandir: "Oh, O.K". [deeper voice] "I love football!" [slaps Toot, who is Xandir's mother] . Wooldoor Sockbat: [points to Captain Hero] "And you be the gay". Captain Hero: [as Xandir's father] "I ain't gonna be no homo!". Wooldoor Sockbat: "Fine, you be Xandir's mum". Captain Hero: [as Xandir's mother in a higher voice] "Alright, I'm asking for this!" [slaps himself] . Toot Braunstein: [Angrily] "Then who the hell am I?". Wooldoor Sockbat: "You're the homo". Toot Braunstein: [wistfully] "Can I be the dad?". Wooldoor Sockbat: "Fine, you be Stan". Xandir: [confused] "Then who the hell am I?". Toot Braunstein: [angrily, as Xandir's father] "The queer!" [punches Captain Hero, who is Xandir's mother] . Wooldoor Sockbat: [disappointed] "I wanted to be the queer!".
	Season 2 / Episode 12: - The Lemon-AIDS Walk Foxxy Love: The AIDS-Walk isn't a contest. It's a charity! Like not spitting on ugly people! [She spits on Toot] I gave at the office.
	Season 2 / Episode 12: - The Lemon-AIDS Walk Spanky Ham: All right, team, let's make these guys eat shuttlecock.
	Season 2 / Episode 12: - The Lemon-AIDS Walk Captain Hero: Hey there, bub. I need the strongest stuff you've got. Vitamin Store Clerk: Well, sir, we've got a terrific line of herbal supplements. Captain Hero: Herbal? What do I look like to you? Some crazy wacko who'll put anything inside his body, and then take pictures of it coming out, and post them on his website, which gets over 10,000 hits a day--most of them in Germany? Do I? Do I?!
	Season 2 / Episode 11: - Xandir and Tim, Sitting In a Tree Captain Hero: Something was amiss. Xandir was acting strange, Tim Tommerson was awfully quiet and I noticed that I was getting fucked in the ass more than usual.
	Season 2 / Episode 11: - Xandir and Tim, Sitting In a Tree Pluto the Dog: [while holding Goofy hostage] He's the only fucking dog good enough to wear fucking pants? Well, I want to wear the fucking pants for once! [Shoots Goofy, then himself]
	Season 2 / Episode 11: - Xandir and Tim, Sitting In a Tree Spanky Ham: All right TV Reviewer, you've gone too far! And who are you to tell us - WHAT THE HELL! Spanky Ham: No wonder you hate the show. You're everything we make fun of. Spanky Ham: You're a Jewish, conservative, pro-life, born-again, overweight, Asian Lesbian broad who cuts herself. Spanky Ham: So, maybe somebody who doesn't happen to be a Jewish, conservative, pro-life, born-again, overweight, Indian lesbian broad who cuts herself, might not be offended by the show. Spanky Ham: Yes! But people should know you're not our audience, asshole!

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