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Fun Facts:» Trivia» Quotes » Goofs |
 | Season 4 / Episode 8: - Where's a Harpoon When You Need One? Maryann Thorpe: I know you're there, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, DICK. Darling, didn't you want to talk? Okay, maybe now's not a good time, but that's not a problem because I'll always be there for you, DICK. Whenever there's acid rain coming from your sprinklers, I'll be there. Whenever there are fire ants in your tanning booth, I'll be there. When you've deluded yet another poor unsuspecting X-ray technician into accepting your loathsome advances and a pack of rabid Dobermans jumps into your Jacuzzi and rips the very soul from your body, I'LL BE THERE! Still don't feel like a chat, sweetheart? [whispers] I can wait. |
| Season 4 / Episode 8: - Where's a Harpoon When You Need One? Maryann Thorpe: Cybill! You swam the Los Angeles Harbor! You risked typhoid, Hepatitis B and future unexplained patches of hair all for me! Oh, pal! We'll hug tomorrow! |
| Season 3 / Episode 26: - Let's Stalk Cybill Sheridan: Okay, now we put the pan fried quail on the plate with the okra, and the grits and the biscuits and gravy. Some people think this food is a little heavy, but it won't hurt ya... if you lift from the knees. |
| Season 3 / Episode 26: - Let's Stalk Sylvia: So listen, it's just between you and one other person. He's a book reviewer. We're going to put you both on the same show to see which one of you the audience takes to. Cybill Sheridan: So, we're gonna duke it out on the air, huh? I love competition. I'll slice him. I'll dice him. I'll puree his sorry bookworm ass. Ira Woodbine: Cybill? Cybill Sheridan: Ira? Ira Woodbine: You're the down-home cooking lady? Cybill Sheridan: You're the sorry bookworm ass? |
| Season 3 / Episode 26: - Let's Stalk Maryann Thorpe: I just realized, Cybill, it's the end of an era. After I'm married, I'll be hanging up my stalking shoes, for good. Do you know what that means? Cybill Sheridan: You'll have Wednesday and Friday nights free. Maryann Thorpe: No. Well... yes, but it also means this is my last chance to commit a senseless act of revenge against Dr. Dick. |
| Season 3 / Episode 26: - Let's Stalk Cybill Sheridan: Hey Zoey, you want to go to Maryann's bachlorette party tonight? We're going *stalking*. Zoey Woodbine: Okay, as long as you promise not to throw me to the cops when you need to make a getaway... like last time. |
| Season 3 / Episode 26: - Let's Stalk Cybill Sheridan: That's not good. |
| Season 2 / Episode 20: - Virgin, Mother, Cheater Cybill Sheridan: I haven't felt so helpless since Grandfather ate the shoe polish and declared war on Virginia. |
| Season 2 / Episode 7: - To Sir, With Lust Maryann Thorpe: I can honestly say that was a truly bad night in the theatre. I walked out feeling like Mary Todd Lincoln. Cybill Sheridan: Yeah, but tonight no one got shot. Unfortunately. |
| Season 2 / Episode 7: - To Sir, With Lust Maryann Thorpe: Dick, Dick, Dick. Poisoning my wine and calling me an old goat. Will he never learn? |
| Season 2 / Episode 7: - To Sir, With Lust Maryann Thorpe: I'll show you an old goat! An old goat that's just eaten seven burritos and more bran flakes than the entire city of Boca Raton! |
| Unknown Episode: Zoey: People with cute nicknames should be used for food. |
| Unknown Episode: Cybill Sheridan: I could have had Diane Keaton's part, but I gave it up for a role in a major motion picture starring... ABBA. [grimaces] |
| Unknown Episode: Backup Singers: [to a Samba beat, as Cybil dances and sexily holds two large coconuts in front of her] Coconuts, coconuts, co- co- co- coconuts. |
| Unknown Episode: Maryann Thorpe: [spying on her ex-husband and singing to the tune of "I've Been Workin' On The Railroad"] The eyes of Maryann are on you, all the live long day/You hired a lawyer and divorced me, but you can't get away. |
| Unknown Episode: Zoey: It's like I'm roasting on a spit in hell, and you two are there with chefs hats and barbeque tongs. |
| Unknown Episode: Kevin Blanders: Oh that's right! Emasculate me! C'mon! Rachel Blanders: It's *always* about your penis, isn't it? |
| Unknown Episode: Zoey: [while watching Cybill do a scene in her unfunny sitcom] I would laugh harder at my own autopsy. |
| Unknown Episode: Cybill Sheridan: Smell me. Maryann Thorpe: Bite me. |
| Unknown Episode: Maryann Thorpe: Did I ever tell you I superglued his penis to his thigh? |
| Unknown Episode: Maryann Thorpe: My mouth feels like I just swallowed sheep. |
| Unknown Episode: Maryann Thorpe: Stink-o-rama! Loser! Must Pee TV! |
| Unknown Episode: Maryann Thorpe: Searing pain! Nerve damage! Temporary blindness! The taste of burnt pennies! |
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