Jeff Greene

Curb Your Enthusiasm

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Played by:

Jeff Garlin
As a multi-talented comedian who encompasses writing, producing, directing, acting and performing stand-up ...

Who is Jeff Greene?

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Episode Screenshots

Season 5, Episode 04	Season 2, Episode 03
Season 2, Episode 06	Season 4, Episode 09

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Jeff Greene Quotes

Unknown Episode:

Jeff Greene: All of the women at HBO, they don't want to work with you.
Larry David: Oh, come on. That's ridiculous.
Jeff Greene: They think you're a misogynist.
Larry David: Why, 'cause I called the guy a cunt? So what!
Jeff Greene: 'Cause you called the guy a cunt.
Larry David: Big deal, I call men pricks all the time, men want to work with me.
Jeff Greene: Well, cunt's worse.
Larry David: Cunt's not worse. Pricks and cunts, they're equal. Pricks, cunts, come on. They balance out.
Jeff Greene: No, cunt is worse. Cunt's much heavier.
Larry David: Why? Why is cunt heavier?
Jeff Greene: I never questioned, it just is.
Larry David: That's sexist to me! Come on.

Unknown Episode:

Larry David: I pee sitting down.
Jeff Greene: You pee sitting down?
Larry David: Yeah! Have you ever tried it?
Jeff Greene: No!
Larry David: It's more comfortable. When you get up during the night you don't have to turn on the light and wake up, and you get to read.
Jeff Greene: What are you reading?
Larry David: I'm reading a lot of stuff.
Jeff Greene: What stuff?
Larry David: If I peed twenty times during a day I can get through a whole New York Times for god's sake!
Jeff Greene: Twenty times?
Larry David: Yeah! Hey buddy, when you're peeing all over your shoe, I'm learnin' somethin'!
Jeff Greene: What makes you think I'm peeing all over my shoe while you're learnin' somethin'?

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