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American Chopper tv show

American Chopper

- Episode Quotes

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American Chopper Quotes

01x07 - Firebike 2 Season 1 / Episode 7: - Firebike 2

Mikey Teutul: But what do I know, I order parts and take out the trash.
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Paul Sr.: Come over here and stand in front of me so I can hit you in the back of the head.
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Paul Sr.: Mikey, get your fat ass upstairs and find my drill bits.
Mikey: I want you to apologize for calling me fat.
Paul Sr.: I apologize for calling you fat. Now get your fat ass up there and find my fuckin' bits!
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Paul Jr.: If you had a clue as to what you were talking about, you'd be dangerous!
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Paul Jr.: If you even had a clue as to what you were talking about, you'd be dangerous!
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Paul Sr.: You're not happy unless you're gettin' me aggravated!
Mikey: Well, you're not happy unless you're aggravated.
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Paul Sr.: That seat's gonna look ridiculous with just a picture of me on it.
Mikey: Well who the hell sent him a picture of just you?
Paul Jr.: It's gonna look ridiculous.
Mikey: I don't care. Every time I sit on it, I'll just... I'll fart.
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Vince DiMartino: I can not emphasize how much you can not do that!
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Paul Sr.: It's not just an Orange County Chopper, it's a New York City Chopper.
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Paul Sr.: I think that the difference between that bike and this bike is that... this bike is yours.
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Mikey: Dad, I'm here to kick your ass!
Paul Sr.: Oh yeah, why me?
Mikey: 'Cuz I'm STRESSED.
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Mikey: You guys want me to hold it on there while you fight about it?
Paul Sr.: [laughing] You know why you're here? You really know? To make me laugh. That's the only reason you're here.
Mikey: Ok. So, let's get this fuckin' bike together!
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Paul Jr.: Uh-oh, grizzly's out!
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Mikey: You know, everybody gives me a problem about the grinder being face up and they think my middle name is "safety". But it's not... It's "danger". No, I'm kidding... It's "Joseph".
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Paul Sr.: Get the job done!
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Will Smith: [after test driving one of the custom bikes] I've GOT to get me one of these!
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Paul Sr.: I've got a size 12 that will inspire!
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Paul Sr.: Do you need any more ideas?
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Paul Sr.: Where the hell is Mikey?
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Paul Sr.: Where the hell is numbnuts?
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Paul Jr.: Somebody needs to get him to the hospital!
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Paul Jr.: Look, there are pieces of Rick on it.
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Rick Petko: There are pieces of me still there.
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Mikey: That car has lasted nine years... longer than any relationship with a girl I ever had.
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Paul Jr.: Gus is the only one of us that can fit in it.
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Mikey: I'm not really a lumberjack... I'm a lazy ass.
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Paul Sr.: Where the hell is Paulie!
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Paul Jr.: Figure it out!
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Mikey: Where's my motorcycle, Daddy?
Paul Sr.: Ha ha ha ha ha...
Mikey: You don't love me.
Unknown Episode Unknown Episode:

Paul Sr.: I'm not going ask twice, cos the second time I'll use my size 12.


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