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Van Helsing movie poster

Van Helsing


Van Helsing Quotes

  • #1
    [Van Helsing transforms into a werewolf, the one thing that can kill Dracula]
    Count Vladislaus Dracula: We are both part of the same great game, Gabriel! But we need not find ourselves on opposing sides of the board...

    [the Werewolf roars. Dracula transforms into a giant bat, and attacks him]
  • #2
    Anna Valerious: Show me your faces!
    Van Helsing: Why?
    Anna Valerious: Because we don't trust strangers.
    Top Hat: Strangers don't last long here.
  • #3
    Frankenstein's Monster: You've been bitten. Bitten by a werewolf. Now you will become that which you have hunted so passionately.

    [Van Helsing takes out a tranquilizer blowgun]
    Van Helsing: I am sorry...
    Frankenstein's Monster: May others be as passionate in the hunting of you.
  • #4
    [Carl hands Van Helsing his latest invention, an automatic crossbow]
    Carl: A work of certifiable genius.
    Van Helsing: If you don't say so yourself.
    Carl: Well, I did say so myself.
  • #5
    Aleera: Don't play coy with me, Princess, you're just like all the other pretty little ancestors in your family. Saying you want to destroy my master, but I know what lurks in your lusting heart.
    Anna Valerious: I hope you have a heart, Aleera, because someday I'm going to drive a stake through it.
  • #6
    Anna Valerious: He's the first one to kill a vampire in over a hundred years. I'd say that's earned him a drink.
  • #7
    Frankenstein's Monster: Curse all you undead! You are nothing but dead bones and damned souls... you shall burn in the fires of hell!
  • #8
    Van Helsing: He's not your brother anymore, Anna!
    Anna Valerious: You knew?
    Van Helsing: Yes.
    Anna Valerious: Before or after I stopped you from shooting him?
    Van Helsing: Before.
    Anna Valerious: And still you tried to kill him!
    Van Helsing: He's a werewolf. He's going to kill people!
    Anna Valerious: It's not his fault! He can't help it!
    Van Helsing: I know, but he's going to do it anyway!
  • #9
    [Van Helsing and Anna are both hanging off the sides of the carriage, hanging over the cliff. While the Monster is chained in his seat, Carl starts to pull Anna in, but Van Helsing's grip starts to fail]
    Frankenstein's Monster: I can help!
    Carl: You won't kill me?
    Frankenstein's Monster: Only if you don't hurry!
  • #10
    Aleera: I want first bite!
  • #11
    Carl: Why does it smell like wet dog in here?
    Van Helsing: [running past him] Werewolf!
    Carl: Oh! You'll be needing silver bullets then.

    [he produces a box of bullets and throws them to Van Helsing, rather deftly]
    Van Helsing: Well done!
  • #12
    Count Vladislaus Dracula: How does it feel to be a puppet on my string?
  • #13
    [Upon seeing a baby vampire for the first time]
    Van Helsing: So this is what you get when vampires mate.
  • #14
    Anna Valerious: You make my skin crawl.
    Count Vladislaus Dracula: This is not all I can do with your skin.
    Count Vladislaus Dracula: [kisses/mouths Anna's neck]
  • #15
    Van Helsing: That's why you're coming with me.
    Carl: The hell be damned that I am.
    Van Helsing: You cursed. Not very well, mind you, but you're a monk. You shouldn't curse at all.
    Carl: Actually, I'm still just a friar. I can curse all I want, dammit.
  • #16
    Villager: He killed a vampire!
    Carl: Isn't that a good thing?
    Top Hat: The Vampires only take what they need to survive. Maybe two or three a month... but now they will kill for revenge!
  • #17
    Van Helsing: Next time, stay close, you're no good to me dead.
  • #18
    Van Helsing: This thing... man... whatever it is... evil may have created it, left its mark on it... but evil does not rule it. So I cannot kill it.
  • #19
    Top Hat: I see the Wolfman hasn't killed you yet.
    Van Helsing: Don't worry. He's getting to it.
  • #20
    Anna Valerious: What are these things?
    Van Helsing: I think they're Dracula's children.
    Anna Valerious: His children?
    Van Helsing: A man, with three gorgeous women, for four hundred years?